Fins Finish Us Off Doom thread

[grog]

When a prayer works, you write it in a book and reuse it when needed. We'll this one worked once and is needed badly again this week. The Fins looked poised to go out with a win. Doomed we is.


Our karma, who aren't a Pats fan,
Sorry be our game,
Thy Phins do run,
They will have fun on turf,
At the expense of us Pats fans.
Give us this day our weakly defense.
And forgive us our best passes,
As we allow Tanny to kick our asses.
And lead us not into the red zone,
But deliver us from the end zone.
For karma is the kingdoom,
The power and glory,
For down after down.
Amen.

Hail Dolphins, we are a disgrace,
Thy Bush is with thee,
Blessed art Fins among gridmen,
and bested are the backs of our defense,
Philbin.
Holey moley, our chances suck,
We are not winners,
now until the quarter of our loss,
Miami.

[king of kings]

I hope the pats got all that crap football out of there system. This is a must win game if they have any chance of getting that bye. They do need a little help for the donkeys.

[gomezcat]

After last week's near catastrophe against the hapless Jags, and the spectacularly lucky 49ers comeback when they let us complete passes, this week sees the NFL's luckiest and cheatingest* ever team meet their deserved fate (in fact, they are the most terrible team in the history of any sport ever, "led" by Mr Asterisk himself; the team is so despicable that A-Rod has asked to join).

The first play goes well, as Stephen Gostkowski connects with the Football. It takes some bounces to get to Ted Ginn who beats everyone on the kick coverage team - three times. The Pats are flagged for unsportsmanlike conduct when they complain at his showboating.

Goodell hires the world's best lawyer and adds some clause to the NFL code of conduct. This allows him to fine the Pats a squillion dollars for their whingeing and he adds the forfeiture of any draft pick, ever. In an entirely free and fair election, overseen by the Commissioner, who is coincidentally dressed in their game jersey, the Jets are elected to take the Pats' playoff spot.The game is stopped to allow this to happen, as all drafted players are immediately banned from the Pats.

The Pats are forced to play on with coaching staff and ballboys making up the numbers. Mc Daniels takes over at QB and is an unmitigated disaster. He shouts at himself for his terrible play-calling but then fires back with jibes about his sucky QB play.

Cameron Wake has a lot of fun lining up against Dante and Bill B doesn't have his best ever game at Centre, as the Doomphins get 30 sacks on 30 plays.

The D is even worse although Pepper has a half decent game.

Final Score - Doomphins: Infinity and beyond
New England Numpties- never again.

[mikiemo83]

Don Shula was heard yelling at the Patriots in the Swiss Family treehouse: you squirrels better have nuts in your mouth or you're going down town... You jack wagons asses are Gtass and I am the lawn mower!!!!

[BostonTim]

Originally Posted by gomezcat

The first play goes well, as Stephen Gostkowski connects with the Football. It takes some bounces to get to Ted Ginn who beats everyone on the kick coverage team - three times. The Pats are flagged for unsportsmanlike conduct when they complain at his showboating.

Ted Ginn? I guess we are F***ed if a 49er scores three times and showboats against us when we're playing Miami.


Cheers, BostonTim

[bmooney54]

If the Pats lose to the Fish...at home...in December...with a bye on the line, they will be one and done in the playoffs. Bank on it.
Karma moving forward.
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[anderson]

[gomezcat]

Originally Posted by BostonTim

Ted Ginn? I guess we are F***ed if a 49er scores three times and showboats against us when we're playing Miami.


Cheers, BostonTim

Ah, it's a secret roster move, which Goodell allows in order to really screw the Pats. Or something.

[MightyMitts]

Not only are we doomed to lose to those smelliest of fish but we also will be relegated to the fourth seed. The only way we host the championship is if it's against the Bengals.

The people declared a fast and put on sackcloth and cried earnestly, from the greatest to the least of them. The people knew victory would elude them.

[king of kings]

Hopefully the o-line has a better game. They sucked big time protecting Brady in Miami. they did do a better job run blocking for Ridley. That was very disrespectful to the fins. Since they kept running the someplace play with success.

[Pyxis]

You guys. It's ass-biting cold in Foxboro. The Fins are going to freeze, literally, halfway through the first quarter. Hell, they were wheels up this afternoon. I'm sure they are frozen right now.
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[AustrianPatriot]

First game without Ron Brace ... we are dooooomed!

[stephenju]

We can't even get a karma thread straight. We are so doomed.

[BostonTim]

Good job, Groggy.


Cheers

[gomezcat]

Originally Posted by BostonTim

Good job, Groggy.


Cheers

It was nothing to do with Grog, and all to do with the despicable tactics shown by the Pats. These included:

- deliberately throwing forward passes to team-mates
- tackling Dolphins players
-scoring touchdowns
-sacking the poor quarterback who hadn't been further North than Texas in his entire existence, and who had never experienced a temperature lower than 60 degrees.
- cheatingly drafting Northern players like Hernandez, Gronkowski, Mc Courty, Chandler Jones and cheatingly acclimatising guys like Hightower and Spikes.

Their luck will end when they get knocked out in next week's wildcard weekend. Oh wait...