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Old 06-11-2005, 10:37 AM   #166
mgoblue101415
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Quote:
Originally posted by Undertaker #59
That is an overly simplistic view of men, MGO.

Sure sex motivates us, but it isn't everything. For example, I would never, and have never slept with a woman on the first date. There has got to be more emotion in the relationship for me to make that kind of step. I don't say this to make myself sound better, but as an example. I am sure there are plenty of other men who feel the same way. To tell you the truth, if a woman WANTS to sleep with me on the first date, she would be refused and I probably would not want to see her again.

I am sure that the majority of men that you would meet in a meat market would not have the same qualms, but I would bet there are a lot more men out there who feel the same way as I do than you realize.

$0.02

I never said all men felt that way, just the vast majority. And I never said the vast majority would sleep with a woman on a first date, I said they were thinking about it.

So, you've stated that you've never had sex on a first date, BUT, have you ever THOUGHT about sex on the first date. Not that you would think about sleeping with her on the first date, but just general thoughts about sleeping with her, even if in the future?
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Old 06-11-2005, 10:39 AM   #167
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Quote:
Originally posted by mgoblue101415
Um... You just described 90% of men.

What makes these things so funny is that they are TRUE. That's men. Some men are better at hiding it, but that doesn't change the fact that they think that way. 99% of the time a man asks a woman out he's not thinking "I'd really like to get to know her better." he's thinking "I'd really like to get her into bed." Now, he may really like her, and may see a future with her, but sex is the #1 priority.
You're not telling me something I don't know about most heterosexual/bisexual men. I'm well aware of how strong and compelling the male sex urge is.

That's not my point. What I'm saying is that smart men do learn to hide it. They learn to sublimate it. The ability to sublimate is an expected part of the maturing process as a human being. Understand? That is why culture and breeding and good behavior are important to men. Especially if they want to "get laid."

I'm actually a very practical woman.

The older you get, the more you come to understand that discretion in word and deed (if not in thought) is essential to getting what you want in life. Perhaps Bideau said it best. This is an immature young man.

And those who don't learn the lesson about discretion wind up on the outside of the door, with blue balls, looking in on the girl and her parrot.

In comparison, men who do come to understand this lesson wind up like Supkem and Agnt...laid.

This is why Wyo's post on "Disinhibition Syndrome" is so relevant in this case. Focus decided to be "honest" on an internet board.

And he got an "honest" response.
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Old 06-11-2005, 10:48 AM   #168
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Guess I'll chime in on this one,, after all,, I have three daughters....

I would have kicked his arse for thinking he could buy one of my girls for $45 at Red Lobster,,,, but then again, my girls were raised to know better....

However, I would also be quite upset with one of mine if I overheard them talking about stiffing a guy that was interested in them for a free lunch... Again,, that's not the way I raised my daughters...

Integrity is important for both sexes.
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Old 06-11-2005, 10:51 AM   #169
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Quote:
Originally posted by chipatsfan
Guess I'll chime in on this one,, after all,, I have three daughters....

I would have kicked his arse for thinking he could buy one of my girls for $45 at Red Lobster,,,, but then again, my girls were raised to know better....

However, I would also be quite upset with one of mine if I overheard them talking about stiffing a guy that was interested in them for a free lunch... Again,, that's not the way I raised my daughters...

Integrity is important for both sexes.
Bravo.

I couldn't agree more. As people, we tend to attract others at our own level.

And breeding counts.
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Old 06-11-2005, 10:56 AM   #170
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Quote:
Originally posted by FallingAlice
Bravo.

I couldn't agree more. As people, we tend to attract others at our own level.

And breeding counts.
Thank you Alice...

I'm always a bit fascinated and amused by what some people will post,,, and then the (sometimes) horror at the reaction they get... Probably why fusion hasn't come back to try and defend himself...
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Old 06-11-2005, 11:08 AM   #171
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Does anyone else believe in the old "you get what you deserve" or "what goes around, comes around"?

He was looking to just get sex and got what he deserved. Was she just looking for a free lunch? Who knows, we don't know what she was thinking, but if that was the case, then she got what she deserved.

Or maybe this was "payback" on her for continually using men to get what she wants. And Fusion will get his "payback" somewhere down the road, for the way he treated this woman.

I really am a firm believer that every action has re-action and that everything happens for a reason.

Hopefully they both learned a lesson from this experience.

But there's been something that's been bothering me about this whole thing.... Don't you think when she agreed to lunch that she would have mentioned she had to back at a certain time? Maybe not mention the ex, but at least make it clear that she had something she had to do? And even if it had come up that day, that she would have mentioned that something had come up and she had to make sure she was home at a certain time? Okay, so maybe she did make it up just to get away from him, but that really does seem like a lame excuse.

Between that, and the leaving her at the restaurant (I mean stiffing her with her part of the bill is one thing, but leaving her without a ride is another), there just seems to be "holes" in the story. I'd say the majority of the story is fabricated. Perhaps he did have a bad date, and when telling his buddies about it one mentioned that he should have just walked out, and now that has become a part of the story. And it makes for an intersting story. But to me, the entire things sounds exactly like a "story".
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Old 06-11-2005, 11:35 AM   #172
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Quote:
Originally posted by mgoblue101415
Does anyone else believe in the old "you get what you deserve" or "what goes around, comes around"?
Yes,, I like to refer to it as "karma."
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So including last night, thatís three damage incidents that didnít kill you. Pain or damage donít end the world, or despair or beatinís. The world ends when youíre dead. Until then, you got more punishment in store. Stand it like a manóand give some back.
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Old 06-11-2005, 11:35 AM   #173
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Quote:
Originally posted by mgoblue101415
[B]Does anyone else believe in the old "you get what you deserve" or "what goes around, comes around"?

He was looking to just get sex and got what he deserved. Was she just looking for a free lunch? Who knows, we don't know what she was thinking, but if that was the case, then she got what she deserved.
Yeah, well, that's pretty much what a lot of us have been saying all along. My first post:

Quote:
You got exactly what you deserved.

I'm not sure she was looking for a free-lunch as much as she was promised a free lunch. That's an important distinction.

Clearly, she took advantage of the promise -- in an inappropriate way. Whether she did this with malice aforethought or simply because she's culturally unsophisticated and selfish is impossible to know. Most of us believe that her behavior, while inappropriate, certainly didn't warrant being left at the table with a check.

As far as the girl talking about her "ex," remember that she doesn't claim to be taken. She just alludes to an "ex."

None of us will ever know why she talks about the ex boyfriend. Whether it was true or not. But it's very possible that she was looking for a way to end the date. Maybe because she was feeling pressured. Certainly, when a man asks you back to his apartment to get to know each other better, that usually feels like a fairly pressure-filled situation. It does for me, at any rate.

And in that case, I would certainly be looking for a reason to end the date.

Quote:
But to me, the entire things sounds exactly like a "story".
We'll never know.
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Old 06-11-2005, 11:46 AM   #174
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Quote:
Originally posted by Undertaker #59
That is an overly simplistic view of men, MGO.

Sure sex motivates us, but it isn't everything. For example, I would never, and have never slept with a woman on the first date. There has got to be more emotion in the relationship for me to make that kind of step. I don't say this to make myself sound better, but as an example. I am sure there are plenty of other men who feel the same way. To tell you the truth, if a woman WANTS to sleep with me on the first date, she would be refused and I probably would not want to see her again.

I am sure that the majority of men that you would meet in a meat market would not have the same qualms, but I would bet there are a lot more men out there who feel the same way as I do than you realize.

$0.02
Thanks for this post.

I do hope you weren't at all offended by any of the discussion or reductive discussion about what men are or aren't.

You're a good man, UT. It's good to think that there are a lot of men like you.
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Old 06-11-2005, 12:01 PM   #175
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Quote:
Originally posted by FallingAlice
He wasn't interested in knowing this woman at all. He was interested in screwing her. That was obvious by his disdain for her "insipidness" and yet, despite his increasing disgust at her and her behavior, was bound and determined to give it one last try to get her into bed.
I'd just like to point out that just because a guy is interested in getting a girl "into the sack" doesn't mean that he's not also interested in getting to know her as well. A large number of guys are interested in both. It's just unfortunate that guys don't have enough blood to be able to operate both the brain and "another organ" as the same time.

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Old 06-11-2005, 12:10 PM   #176
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Quote:
Originally posted by dchester
I'd just like to point out that just because a guy is interested in getting a girl "into the sack" doesn't mean that he's not also interested in getting to know her as well. A large number of guys are interested in both. It's just unfortunate that guys don't have enough blood to be able to operate both the brain and "another organ" as the same time.


In deference to other men on the board, I claim ignorance over this particular biological process and whether or not you're able to "mulitask."

But if you look at Fusion's original post, it's pretty clear that by the end of the lunch, his "only" intention is pretty clear.
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Old 06-11-2005, 12:18 PM   #177
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Quote:
Originally posted by mgoblue101415
But to me, the entire things sounds exactly like a "story".
maybe that is all this is, a story to take up the off season blues, I doubt it. This guy obviously was looking for the rebound score, every man thinks about it. get back in the saddle so to speak.

I, like 'taker am not looking to hope in bed on the first date, but will not say I never have. I also think we may have over analyzed this a bit, todays youth, I worked with a lot of northeastern university coops, are a little more open with their sexuality. It is common place for these guys to video tape themselves with others and the pictures I have been email are insane. One went to far to set up a web sight of his exploits.

If he is as young as I think he is, and If she carries herself the way a lot of todays females do then obviously sex would be the first thing on his mind. I know I am generalizing but they are either college age or just out, just my opinion. These kids today are sexually free, look how many claim to be virgins still because they explore anal sex or oral, He thought he had a live one and when the conversation soured so did his chances, but doing like any guy would he figured why not, I just liquered her up and she seems the type, so he asked to get to know her, you can't blame the guy for trying.

The problem then becomes the chew and screw, granted he left his cash but she was under the impression that she had a free meal ( maybe even diner). She was wrong for using his good will to "pick-up the tab" and he was wrong to think a free meal would get him laid. So she says no and he gets mad for being taken advantage of. Up to this point everyonge is pretty much in agreement that she used him and is wrong based on his story.

the problem is what happens next,

I was taught by my parents but specifically my Dad, in his backarse way, not to disrespect women, and by leaving her there with the bill and without a ride he disrespected her as a person, Yes ,she laid a turd on him first but are we children or adults. Two wrongs don't make a right, blah blah blah. He was better served taking her home, eating some pride at that point and just being himself the next time he saw her, be the better person, $45 is a cheap cost to learn the lesson he did. Trust my this will not be the last time he gets screwed without physical contact, the wrath of a woman scorned is not something to toy with and if what he implies is correct she may seek restitution of some kind.

fusion come back and set us straight if we are wrong

that said I could be wrong, I could be right
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Old 06-11-2005, 12:19 PM   #178
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Quote:
Originally posted by mgoblue101415
See, men, for the most part, don't care. They just want sex.

And even married men or men in a relationship think the same way. They take their wife or girlfriend out for a nice romantic dinner they're doing it for one reason... To get laid. You think most men really want to get dressed up, shell out a bunch of cash, and carry on a conversation all night because they enjoy it? They know the woman likes it, so they do it to make her happy, and if she appreciates it they're expecting her to sleep with him. And when the couple gets home and the woman's tired and doesn't put out.... She'll be dealing with one pissy husband/boyfriend the next day.

That's life.

Condemn the guy for walking out and not paying for the entire bill, but to condemn a guy for only wanting sex.... Well, you're condemning the the vast majority of the male race. They are what they are.
I think you're pretty close, but here's how I would put it. I think that most men want more than sex, however if we're getting sex, we can put up with an awful lot of other flaws.


The moral of the story ladies, if you want to keep your husband's happy, feed him occasionally, and give him a BJ every night. Now if you want to go the extra mile, watch football with him (but don't ask to many questions), and take him to strip clubs. Basically, if more women were like MGO, men would never leave their wives.

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Old 06-11-2005, 12:24 PM   #179
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Quote:
Originally posted by FallingAlice


In deference to other men on the board, I claim ignorance over this particular biological process and whether or not you're able to "mulitask."

But if you look at Fusion's original post, it's pretty clear that by the end of the lunch, his "only" intention is pretty clear.
That's exactly my point, by the end of lunch, his blood had headed south. If they had partaken in some "activities" that had allowed the blood to return north, then he might have been able to show her that he was interested in her personality as well.

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Old 06-11-2005, 12:37 PM   #180
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Quote:
Originally posted by dchester

The moral of the story ladies, if you want to keep your husband's happy, feed him occasionally, and give him a BJ every night. Now if you want to go the extra mile, watch football with him (but don't ask to many questions), and take him to strip clubs. Basically, if more women were like MGO, men would never leave their wives.
Well, you know DChester....as your avatar shows...

You are a pig.



I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I love you, man. It just occurred to me how funny that is.

And...now exhausted...I will leave this thread forever with one last thought..

Maybe the moral of the story is...














There's no such thing as a free lunch.



Ciao,
FA
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