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-   -   OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post) (http://www.patriotsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=11122)

fusion99 06-09-2005 09:10 PM

OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
It's only been a week since I dumped my girlfriend, but I am quickly getting back on my feet. Yesterday, I had a lunch date that I set with a cute little chick, whom I met at the gym on Wednesday. I agreed to take her out to lunch, my treat.

All was going well. I picked her up from her apartment complex and we had some good conversation on the way to the restaurant. She didn't even mind me stopping off at the P.O. to ship out a package real quick. Seemed pretty easygoing.

We arrive at Red Lobster, which is her favorite restaurant, and I'm already planning out our future f**k sessions in my mind, as I eye her ample bust and rear (accentuated by a very slim waist, score!).

The waiter arrives and we order our drinks. I have a coke and she has a margarita - the most expensive one. At this point I'm like "no big deal, maybe the booze will get her going and we can f**k sometime today!" The waiter disappears for awhile and more small talk ensues. She's funny and says something interesting semi-regularly, but does whine a bit.

Our waiter comes back with the drinks and asks if we're ready to order. Being a gentleman, I ask the lady what she would like, to which she replies "I would like an appetizer, the quesadilla's, a bowl of clam chowder and, for lunch, the New England platter." Now, we are out for "lunch" mind you. Lunch. I try to hide my concern while ordering my Aztec Chicken. Then she drives another nail into the coffin.

"Oh, and bring me another Margarita when this one's empty, and a coke when you get the chance."

WTF?!??

As she finishes her first margarita, more and more drama, complaints and gossip come flying out of her mouth - replacing anything interesting or funny she had been saying up until now.

I sit through her drinks, appetizer, soup and increasingly insipid conversation before our meals hit the table. We finally get our meals and as I'm digging into my Aztec Chicken, it happens.

"Tee hee! Could I get a box for this?"

At this point in the game, I'm ready to pop. I offered to take this girl out to lunch, not buy her her 2000 calories for the day and takeout lunch for tommorow.

With margarita #2 down she has become incredibly annoying to converse with. All semblance of normal, worthwhile conversation went where those margaritas will end up once they've travelled through this skanktron's digestive system.

The dreaded bill finally arrives. The damage is extensive. My end of the bill, $10.53. Her end, $35.32.

To say that I felt taken advantage of would be an understatement. Call me overly polite, but when someone offers to take me out to lunch, I try to keep the costs minimal - a simple drink, meal sized appropriate for the time of day and, maybe, a split appetizer.

I have one last shot at making this worthwhile.

"I've had a great time with you. Perhaps you'd like to go to your place and spend some more time together, talking and getting to know each other," I say with the sincerest expression of interest and kindness that I can muster.

She replies, "I have to pick up my ex-boyfriend from the court house in an hour. His mother dropped him off, but I'm his only ride back."

Game over.

I exchange a few more bits of small talk, sneak $15 under the bill when she's not paying attention, excuse myself to the restroom and walk the f**k out as nonchalantly as possible. No one notices. My getaway is complete, both literally and figuratively.

Dirtywater 06-09-2005 09:23 PM

My first clue that she was no good was that 'Red Lobster' was her favorite restaurant. Red Lobster?

Ras 06-09-2005 09:31 PM

From my perspective you did end up getting f**cked! Gee, and you didn't even like it!

heldicus 06-10-2005 12:12 AM

When the hell did red lobster start serving quesedillas?

PatsWin2002 06-10-2005 12:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by heldicus
When the hell did red lobster start serving quesedillas?
:LOL:

Threadkiller 06-10-2005 01:11 AM

Dude, as soon as she said Red Lobster was her favorite restaurant you should have known that by the end of lunch she'd be picking her ex-boyfriend up at court. Wait. Don't tell me. Was he in for drunk and disorderly or misdemeanor methamphetamine possession.

Oh. And how was the Aztec Chicken?

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 06:25 AM

From one woman's perspective...
 
I suspect your date knew that the only thing you were interested in was getting laid.

Here's a tip. Most women, no matter how otherwise dumb, can usually tell when this is the case.


You complain about her insipid conversation. You give her the most "sincere" expression of your interest.

You got exactly what you deserved.

And I'd be very careful, if I were you, about walking out on a check -- especially on a woman who's about to pick up her "ex" from a court-house.

You really don't know what she's going to tell him about you or how she's going to characterize your "date" or what you did to her.

B A Rabbit 06-10-2005 06:43 AM

So what happens when you go back to the gym?

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 06:51 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Supkem
So what happens when you go back to the gym?
:thumb: ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL :clap:

Brilliant.

Why do I suspect that this has all the makings of a classic thread?

joephoto 06-10-2005 07:00 AM

Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Quote:

Originally posted by fusion99
excuse myself to the restroom and walk the f**k out as nonchalantly as possible. No one notices.
You offered to take her to lunch. You pay the bill for lunch.

No controversy here.

KenJr30 06-10-2005 07:10 AM

Is this a Penthouse forum? Only $45 total bill at Red Lobster? That is cheap for Red Lobster. What are ya bitchin' about?

bideau 06-10-2005 07:12 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
:thumb: ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL :clap:

Brilliant.

Why do I suspect that this has all the makings of a classic thread?

It would also make a great reality show.

That "cute little chick" will be loaded for bear the next time she goes to the gym.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 07:33 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by bideau
It would also make a great reality show.

That "cute little chick" will be loaded for bear the next time she goes to the gym.

I'm laughing so hard that I'm crying now.

I'm going to have to alert Wyo to this thread. She will undoubtedly have a very....wyo take.

But seriously...the really funny part is everything that flew under Fusion's radar screen as he made his clumsy attempts to get her into the sack.

More than likely, the progression of her internal monologue went something like this...

1. God this guy's a bore. But he won't leave me alone until I go out with him. Well, okay, lunch won't be so bad.

2. Oh goody, I get to go on errands with him. Typical self-centered idiot. No doubt his schedule is the only one that matters. Be nice. Be nice. This'll take no more than an hour. Get through it.

3. J-e-s-u-s C-h-r-i-s-t, can he stop staring at my breasts? Oh come on, buddy, why don't you just start drooling....oh my god, he is drooling.

4. Can he stop talking about himself? Make this stop. Okay, I'm sure as hell going to make sure we don't have a follow-up date.

5. Let's see...how can I really piss him off? Whining might not be enough. I know. Eat three times my weight in food? Excellent plan.

6. Is this joker serious? Come back to my place and get to know each other? Right. uh-huh. I know what this jerk-off wants. Oh, god. Think of something...quick...I GOT IT...VIOLENT EX-BOYFRIEND...That'll scare him away. Whew. I am toooo good.

7. He's buying it, too. What a maroon.

8. Where'd the little s-h-i-t go? This guy can't afford a decent lunch at Red Lobster. Well, thank god he's gone. He's never gonna call me back, now. Bullet dodged.

9. Wait'll all the girls at the gym hear about this one.

KenJr30 06-10-2005 07:38 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
I'm laughing so hard that I'm crying now.

I'm going to have to alert Wyo to this thread. She will undoubtedly have a very....wyo take.

But seriously...the really funny part is everything that flew under Fusion's radar screen as he made his clumsy attempts to get her into the sack.

More than likely, the progression of her internal monologue went something like this...

1. God this guy's a bore. But he won't leave me alone until I go out with him. Well, okay, lunch won't be so bad.

2. Oh goody, I get to go on errands with him. Typical self-centered idiot. No doubt his schedule is the only one that matters. Be nice. Be nice. This'll take no more than an hour. Get through it.

3. J-e-s-u-s C-h-r-i-s-t, can he stop staring at my breasts? Oh come on, buddy, why don't you just start drooling....oh my god, he is drooling.

4. Can he stop talking about himself? Make this stop. Okay, I'm sure as hell going to make sure we don't have a follow-up date.

5. Let's see...how can I really piss him off? Whining might not be enough. I know. Eat three times my weight in food? Excellent plan.

6. Is this joker serious? Come back to my place and get to know each other? Right. uh-huh. I know what this jerk-off wants. Oh, god. Think of something...quick...I GOT IT...VIOLENT EX-BOYFRIEND...That'll scare him away. Whew. I am toooo good.

7. He's buying it, too. What a maroon.

8. Where'd the little s-h-i-t go? This guy can't afford a decent lunch at Red Lobster. Well, thank god he's gone. He's never gonna call me back, now. Bullet dodged.

9. Wait'll all the girls at the gym hear about this one.

OMG Alice! That is so funny I am cryin'. This has got to be the post of the year in IMO. ROFL

mikiemo83 06-10-2005 08:10 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
5. Let's see...how can I really piss him off? Whining might not be enough. I know. Eat three times my weight in food? Excellent plan.

9. Wait'll all the girls at the gym hear about this one.

on #5, I thought I just found girls with big appetites, you mean it could have been ME!!! oh the shame.

on #9, I guess not all publicity is good publicity

DO girls really talk about guys like this?

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 08:17 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by mikiemo83
on #5, I thought I just found girls with big appetites, you mean it could have been ME!!! oh the shame.

on #9, I guess not all publicity is good publicity

DO girls really talk about guys like this?

Well, some girls have big appetites. This one works out so maybe that played into it.

There are women's locker rooms, most certainly. Especially at the gym.

And you do know that age-old question about why women go to the bathroom in twos? It's downright cliche. But what do you think we're really doing in there? Really?

And keep your mind out of the gutter.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 08:18 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by KenJr30
OMG Alice! That is so funny I am cryin'. This has got to be the post of the year in IMO. ROFL
Coming from you, Ken, that is a great compliment.

But really...Fusion just gave me a soft lob right over the plate.

;)

mikiemo83 06-10-2005 08:36 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
And you do know that age-old question about why women go to the bathroom in twos? It's downright cliche. But what do you think we're really doing in there? Really?

And keep your mind out of the gutter.

I just thought they had to go and in the places I hang it was a safety issue.

I have never been in the gutter while I was sober and it is still early

RoadGrader 06-10-2005 08:36 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by KenJr30
OMG Alice! That is so funny I am cryin'. This has got to be the post of the year in IMO.

Originally posted by FallingAlice

Coming from you, Ken, that is a great compliment.

But really...Fusion just gave me a soft lob right over the plate.

;)

being that KenJr30 is a Colt's fan, he knows a good beatin' when he sees one

Annihilus 06-10-2005 08:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
Coming from you, Ken, that is a great compliment.

But really...Fusion just gave me a soft lob right over the plate.

;)

Remind Annihilus to never complain about anything that he thought was someone else's bad because by the time you get done tearing his story apart he'll be home in the bathroom with the lights off sucking his thumb.

Annihilus guesses this thread proves that whole 'there's two sides to every story' cliche`.

Did Annihilus ever mention that his co-worker talks too much? He wonders how that could possibly be his fault.

mikiemo83 06-10-2005 08:48 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Annihilus
Did Annihilus ever mention that his co-worker talks too much? He wonders how that could possibly be his fault.
You listen

Undertaker #59* 06-10-2005 08:51 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Annihilus
Remind Annihilus to never complain about anything that he thought was someone else's bad because by the time you get done tearing his story apart he'll be home in the bathroom with the lights off sucking his thumb.

No kidding.

I have more sympathy for Fusion after reading the entirety of this thread than I did after only reading his post.

I hope you guys didn't ascare him away.

spiderman 06-10-2005 09:09 AM

If Fusion's angle was to "get laid" then he went about this all wrong.

If you meet a girl at the gym, you say, "Hey, I'm going to be at such and such a place on Friday night, you should meet me there."

If she does she's probably interested in the same thing you are, and you're not necessarily obligated to buy her anything if things go poorly. If things end up going really bad you can both go about your business.

FA is probably correct, this girl may have been unable to say no to a date, but if you leave the open ended "meet at a bar if you want" invitation, not only do you not seem overly eager, but if she really isn't interested she won't show up.

I would only ask someone to dinner after you got to know them somewhat and got signals that they may be interested.

That's just my $.02, it worked for me, but what do I know I've been away from the dating scene for a while.

edit: Oh, and if the girl isn't throwing you any signals don't ever use the "Let's go back to your place and get to know each other better." You just end up sounding pathetic. If she wants that, she'll invite you, or at least hint at it.

dropKickMurphy 06-10-2005 10:03 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dirtywater
What you did was offer to go to lunch and get to know each other, not be taken advantage of. As I was reading, I knew that you were not going to pay for her....
Actually.....
Quote:

Originally posted by fusion99
Yesterday, I had a lunch date that I set with a cute little chick, whom I met at the gym on Wednesday. I agreed to take her out to lunch,my treat.

Sorry, fusion. Sure, the woman didn't exactly show much class by running up 3X the tab you did.
But what you did was far worse. You not only went back on your word, you also snuck out like a coward. For what...to save yourself $35.32?
That seems like a pretty cheap price for your integrity.
I'm not saying you were wrong to feel that she was taking advantage of you. But I think you'd be feeling a lot better about yourself if you had simply picked up the tab, thanked her for the pleasant conversation, and forgotten about her.
In the long run, you won't often regret your decision to take the high road.

dropKickMurphy 06-10-2005 10:12 AM

Re: From one woman's perspective...
 
Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
I suspect your date knew that the only thing you were interested in was getting laid.

Here's a tip. Most women, no matter how otherwise dumb, can usually tell when this is the case.

ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL

Yeah, they don't need to be rocket scientist to figure that out!

Here's another tip...for the women:
Q: When do you know that a guy wants to f#ck you?
A: When he talks to you.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 11:00 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Annihilus
Remind Annihilus to never complain about anything that he thought was someone else's bad because by the time you get done tearing his story apart he'll be home in the bathroom with the lights off sucking his thumb.

No, no. Something about you, Anni, doesn't scream out to me, "Deadbeat." And I expect that's true of the great majority of posters on this board. Then again, I doubt many on this board would be so idiotic as to let everyone know they're a welcher and to imagine that it reflects well upon them.

Based on my experience of you, I imagine if you have a perspective about someone doing you wrong, it's because they did you wrong.

The subtext I provided was merely one woman's perspective on the sometimes subtle way in which women are able to both read situations and get their messages across.

If Fusion likes to get laid, he may want to view my reply not so much as a disembowelling per se. But as a cautionary tale. ;)

I would like to add that Spider and dropkick's advice is completely on the mark.

Oh, and... yes, women actually do know the answer to the age-old question...when do you know that a guy...? We've known that answer a long time. Nevertheless, I've always take that answer to be more a function of biology than real desire. And I know that plenty of men have standards, taste, decency and are gentlemen who, despite their own needs and urges, still have the capacity to view the objects of their desire as human beings and not simply a collage of genitalia...

Or at least have the good sense and self-control to pretend they do...

Tip to Fusion -- women are more inclined to hop in bed with a gentleman than a pig. Especially pigs who don't pay their tabs.

I'll be curious to hear Wyo's response on this. You may find that my answer was relatively light-hearted toward our story-teller by comparison.

I can't wait to hear her take and maybe a diagnosis of good ole Fusion. I'd hazard a guess. And it's not a pretty one. But I'm not a professional.

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 11:02 AM

Fusion is getting a raw deal here.

You gals are getting on him for revealing the inner most monologue of a young guy who is human and dating. Now, I can't say all guys go out for a lunch date looking to get laid, but chances are, if they are hetero, it's well in their mind.

Still doesn't excuse her behavior. Because he wanted to get laid, he deserves the "I'll order everything" treatment? And we're assuming he was staring at her breats the entire lunch to help make the arguement.

Raw deal. Maybe I'm wrong, but the silly stuff hasn't convinved me. I think he was just being honest.

Now with that said, the obvious chances of taking a girl out to a lunch date and thinking one would 'get some' to me seems pretty slim for a first date, so you have a point there. Either way, I don't see that he deserves the "you have to pay for me to order a ton of food to take home because you want to have sex." routine.

I say good for him. Come back Fusion, I promise we're good peeps.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dirtywater
Fusion is getting a raw deal here.

You gals are getting on him for revealing the inner most monologue of a young guy who is human and dating. Now, I can't say all guys go out for a lunch date looking to get laid, but chances are, if they are hetero, it's well in their mind.

Still doesn't excuse her behavior. Because he wanted to get laid, he deserves the "I'll order everything" treatment? And we're assuming he was staring at her breats the entire lunch to help make the arguement.

Raw deal. Maybe I'm wrong, but the silly stuff hasn't convinved me. I think he was just being honest.


You're comparing running up a tab as being comparable to anger over not getting laid and therefore walking out on a check?

I don't know too many people who would do that. Most would take dropkick's advice. Preserve your integrity (if you have any to begin with) and lick your wounds in private with some class.

Here's another tip: If Fusion can't afford to take a woman out, then he should be honest and say so. If he's actually willing to get to know her and she likes him, then you know what? She'll be willing to go Dutch treat.

Tell me..Dirtywater...if you had a daughter, would you like to know that she had gone out with Fusion with his expectation that she should be willing to lay him for a bill of approximately $45.00?

If so, then know this...you're raising a whore. And a cheap one at that.

I'd be very interested in hearing the perspective of men on this board who have daughters and what they thought about Fusion's approach to women.

As far as I can tell, Fusion's the kind of man that my father had in mind when he would give me $20.00 before I left on a date, "In case anything went wrong."

mikiemo83 06-10-2005 11:16 AM

I wonder if she had the cash to offset the rest of the bill on her of figured let him pay for it, I'll get a free meal and dinner too.

but if she was dumb enough not to carry the money, how did she explain her way out of it? and what will she do when she sees him again at the gym?

KenJr30 06-10-2005 11:17 AM

Man, Alice is fired up on this thread. I like it!

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 11:20 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
You're comparing running up a tab as being comparable to anger over not getting laid and therefore walking out on a check?


Not at all. That is your perception. I took it this way.

- Young man took out young woman for said lunch (I like saying 'said lunch')

- Young man has hormones and was honest with us when he stated he wanted to get laid (as just about every young man does)

- Young man took young woman to her favorite restaurant, said 'Red Lobster'

- At said lunch, young woman orders excessively

- At said lunch, young woman does not bother to eat her food (did she ever have that intention) and instead asks for a take-home box

- Young man felt used and taken advantage of

- Young man skips out on check


Now, would I have walked out without paying? No. But in my mind I would have wished I did. Maybe that's why I felt good for him, almost like doing something I wished I would have.

mikiemo83 06-10-2005 11:23 AM

Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Quote:

Originally posted by fusion99
All was going well. I picked her up from her apartment complex and we had some good conversation on the way to the restaurant. .....


I exchange a few more bits of small talk, sneak $15 under the bill when she's not paying attention, excuse myself to the restroom and walk the f**k out as nonchalantly as possible. No one notices. My getaway is complete, both literally and figuratively.


How did she get home?

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 11:24 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
Tell me..Dirtywater...if you had a daughter, would you like to know that she had gone out with Fusion and his expectation that she should be willing to lay him for a bill of approximately $45.00?

If so, then know this...you're raising a whore. And a cheap one at that.

I'd be very interested in hearing the perspective of men on this board who have daughters and what they thought about Fusion's approach to women.

As far as I can tell, Fusion's the kind of man that my father had in mind when he would give me $20.00 before I left on a date, "In case anything went wrong."

Well, I know guys and I would tell her that she had better be aware that a lot of guys think and act that way. You had one great Dad, who gave you great advice and cash. Not every girl today is being raised like that.

I just think we are bashing a young guy for acting like a young guy. Sure he should have done the "classy thing" and payid and left, but in the heat of the moment while being insulted, not everyone acts the same way.

And BTW, I don't even have a daughter yet and you're already calling her a whore?! Woman, why can't they just get along. ;)

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 11:26 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by KenJr30
Man, Alice is fired up on this thread. I like it!
;)

Spinal Tap 06-10-2005 11:27 AM

At least Fusion likes girls. That seems to be a rare attribute on this board lately. (see the Fab 5 gay love fest thread)

I think Fusion did the wrong thing by walking out on the check, but I also understand where his frustration comes from. I'm assuming this chick is some gym whore hottie that probably goes on a few lunch dates a week. She knows she's hot and she uses her hotness as a weapon to punish the common man. These kinds of chicks are a dime a dozen. They've got nothing going for them, other than their sweet arse and bodacious bombs. The only real power they have is over men.............and they use it well.

dchester 06-10-2005 11:30 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dirtywater
Fusion is getting a raw deal here.

. . .

I say good for him. Come back Fusion, I promise we're good peeps.

I think Fusion's mostly guilty of not understanding how some women are simply incapable of being direct, open, and honest with people. It would have been much better for all concerned if the girl just said, "No, I'm not interested", to the date. But somehow, many women seem to feel it's better (and more sensitive) to just lie, and waste everyone's time (and of course cause more hurt feelings than if they had been straight to begin with).

Similar to what others have already said, I also really doubt that she was going to pick up her ex-con boyfriend afterwards. It's just one of those lies that women use instead of saying, "No, it's not working out".

In any case, I still think you should have paid for the dinner, but I don't think you're a bad guy (at least not yet :D ). You just need to realize that accepting a date for a meal does not mean the girl has any interest in going to bed with you.
________
Honda CL90

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 11:31 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dirtywater
Well, I know guys and I would tell her that she had better be aware that a lot of guys think and act that way. You had one great Dad, who gave you great advice and cash. Not every girl today is being raised like that.

I just think we are bashing a young guy for acting like a young guy. Sure he should have done the "classy thing" and payid and left, but in the heat of the moment while being insulted, not everyone acts the same way.

And BTW, I don't even have a daughter yet and you're already calling her a whore?! Woman, why can't they just get along. ;)

You're a nice man, Dirtywater.

That you don't have a daughter makes a lot of sense to me. I think if you did, you may rethink your position.

And I really hope that if you're ever raising sons that you may rethink your position.

Their good name and future will depend on far better behavior than you accept.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 11:33 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Spinal Tap
At least Fusion likes girls. That seems to be a rare attribute on this board lately. (see the Fab 5 gay love fest thread)

I think Fusion did the wrong thing by walking out on the check, but I also understand where his frustration comes from. I'm assuming this chick is some gym whore hottie that probably goes on a few lunch dates a week. She knows she's hot and she uses her hotness as a weapon to punish the common man. These kinds of chicks are a dime a dozen. They've got nothing going for them, other than their sweet arse and bodacious bombs. The only real power they have is over men.............and they use it well.

You, Spinal, are the perfect patsy for that kind of woman.

If you imagine that your incredibly demeaning attitudes toward the opposite sex don't play out -- clearly -- to women, then you're wrong.

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 11:34 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
You're a nice man, Dirtywater.

That you don't have a daughter makes a lot of sense to me. I think if you did, you may rethink your position.

That your not a guy makes a lot of sense to me as to why you don't see a young guy's perspective too. It's a two way street.

Either way, they were both wrong. It's just the 18 year old in me that has been screwed over that felt proud for of him for not taking it.

I can see your side too. :thumb:

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 11:34 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by dchester
I think Fusion's mostly guilty of not understanding how some women are simply incapable of being direct, open, and honest with people. It would have been much better for all concerned if the girl just said, "No, I'm not interested", to the date. But somehow, many women seem to feel it's better (and more sensitive) to just lie, and waste everyone's time (and of course cause more hurt feelings than if they had been straight to begin with).


That, I agree with.

mikiemo83 06-10-2005 11:34 AM

What he did is his choice, but he did offer to pay and picked her up for lunch at her favorite resturaunt.

Fusion looks bad because he left after her objecting to getting to know each other more at his/her place and her stating she had to get her ex- boyfriend. He looks like he found out she wasn't interested and left because of that, not the cost of the food.

Undertaker #59* 06-10-2005 11:35 AM

Wow.

Okay..I am looking for odds at this point on which way this thread will go:

An instant classic.

Or a locked thread.


It could go either way right now I think.

Alcoholic9* 06-10-2005 11:36 AM

Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Quote:

Originally posted by fusion99


"I've had a great time with you. Perhaps you'd like to go to your place and spend some more time together, talking and getting to know each other,"


WORST.COME.ON.LINE.EVER! :blah: :p

Annihilus 06-10-2005 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
If you imagine that your incredibly demeaning attitudes toward the opposite sex don't play out -- clearly -- to women, then you're wrong.
Or towards the same sex. As the case may be.

B A Rabbit 06-10-2005 11:37 AM

I don't know, I think she was a heifer.

Maybe This fission guy made the rest of the story up to hide his inadequacies concerning seafood. I mean who goes to a seafood resturant and orders Chicken?

He sould have ordered the Scrood and told her that he loved Fish, LOVED IT! can't get enough of it! That would have sent a signal to the Girl of what he was looking for. Instead he balked. "I'll have the Aztec Chicken" Right there she new the guy wasn't for real and she wasn't going to be Satisfied. Why not get something out of the deal? I don't blame her.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 11:37 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dirtywater
That your not a guy makes a lot of sense to me as to why you don't see a young guy's perspective too. It's a two way street.

Either way, they were both wrong. It's just the 18 year old in me that has been screwed over that felt proud for of him for not taking it.

I can see your side too. :thumb:

Oh, I see his perspective.

Just know that as a 41-year-old woman with more than twice the life experience of an 18-year-old...if fusion were my 18-year-old son...

I would be ashamed of him and mortified at his behavior.

KenJr30 06-10-2005 11:37 AM

Re: Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Alcoholic9
WORST.COME.ON.LINE.EVER! :blah: :p
ROFL

mgoblue101415 06-10-2005 11:39 AM

This just reminds me of the Sienfeld episode with the "Big Salad". :LOL: There are certain rule differences between lunch and dinner dates.

My 2 cents. She is a classless idiot who gets by, and away with things, because of her looks. Women like that are the ones who give the rest of us a bad name.

If women can walk out on a date because a man is being to forward, or a creep, or just an idiot, then men have the same right to walk out on a woman under similiar circumstances.

And as to leaving her with the check.... The sad thing is that this woman probably got out of having to pay it. She probably cried to the manager about how her date took off, stiffing her with the check... You know, a big sob story. Poor little me.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 11:40 AM

Re: Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Quote:

Originally posted by mikiemo83
How did she get home?
You ask really good questions. Why am I thinking that you have a daughter?

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 11:41 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Annihilus
Or towards the same sex. As the case may be.
Just so.

KenJr30 06-10-2005 11:42 AM

Re: Re: Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
You ask really good questions. Why am I thinking that you have a daughter?
Someone else probably swooped in and took care of fusion's business, minus lunch.

B A Rabbit 06-10-2005 11:42 AM

Re: Re: Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
You ask really good questions. Why am I thinking that you have a daughter?
Acctually he was thinking, "Why not" if she's still there...

KenJr30 06-10-2005 11:42 AM

Re: Re: Re: Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Supkem
Acctually he was thinking, "Why not" if she's still there...
mikie was thinking 'bout sliding in the back door.

dchester 06-10-2005 11:44 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Undertaker #59
Wow.

Okay..I am looking for odds at this point on which way this thread will go:

An instant classic.

Or a locked thread.

It could go either way right now I think.

2 to 1 odds that it's an instant classic.
;)
________
buy magic flight launch box

bideau 06-10-2005 11:44 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Annihilus
Or towards the same sex. As the case may be.
I guess I'm 0 for 2 now. I have a gay son and a daughter who goes to the gym.

I guess that means I won't be getting a Christmas card this year :sulk:

KenJr30 06-10-2005 11:45 AM

"This thread is worthless without pics"

mgoblue101415 06-10-2005 11:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by bideau
I guess I'm 0 for 2 now. I have a gay son and a daughter who goes to the gym.

I guess that means I won't be getting a Christmas card this year :sulk:

Awwww.... I'll send you a christmas card bid.

bideau 06-10-2005 11:49 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by mgoblue101415
Awwww.... I'll send you a christmas card bid.
Will it have that pic of you in the Brady jersey o:-)

mgoblue101415 06-10-2005 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by bideau
Will it have that pic of you in the Brady jersey o:-)

Only if you've been a good boy this year. ;)

Although, when your wife gets the mail that day and opens the card she may have some questions about some red head in nothing but a Brady jersey. :p

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 11:53 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
Oh, I see his perspective.

Just know that as a 41-year-old woman with more than twice the life experience of an 18-year-old...if fusion were my 18-year-old son...

I would be ashamed of him and mortified at his behavior.

Well, there lies the difference between us. I would have upset that he skipped out on the bill (the Dad in me) and I would have been upset that he left a young woman without a ride, but mortified? Nope. It takes two to tango and they were both wrong.

Now, talk to me about her behavior. You've let your feelings be known about the guy. Being female does not make one without faults.

I'm curious for your take on her behaivor?


...And UT, this thread is a healthy debate, no need to the lock.

Hawg73 06-10-2005 11:53 AM

All I have to say is that it sucks to be so busy at work that you miss a thread like this and come in too late to pick over the carcass.

For the record, I think he should have dropped the extra 35 and gone for a revenge fu@k even if it didn't happen that day.

It's extremely possible that Ms Boobsaplenty might have felt guilty about robbing him blind and felt like making horizontal amends at another time.

I never really noticed Fusion until today. I will from now on assuming he comes back to defend himself.

Good luck! and this thread was good fun.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 11:54 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by mgoblue101415
This just reminds me of the Sienfeld episode with the "Big Salad". :LOL: There are certain rule differences between lunch and dinner dates.

My 2 cents. She is a classless idiot who gets by, and away with things, because of her looks. Women like that are the ones who give the rest of us a bad name.

If women can walk out on a date because a man is being to forward, or a creep, or just an idiot, then men have the same right to walk out on a woman under similiar circumstances.

And as to leaving her with the check.... The sad thing is that this woman probably got out of having to pay it. She probably cried to the manager about how her date took off, stiffing her with the check... You know, a big sob story. Poor little me.

There are certain rule differences between lunch and dinner dates? Do please enumerate them for me. I'll be fascinated to hear them.

Whoever said that a women has a right to walk away from a date because a man is being a creep or idiot and stick them with the bill they promised they'd pay?

Now... any woman (or man) has every right and responsibility to walk away from a date if they're feeling abused or threatened.

But I think we've all been on dates that turned out to be less than what we wanted. Most of us stick it out. And behave decently and find a way to communicate -- with some sensitivity --sometime during or afterward that, sorry, I'm just not interested. Or alternately, we have to listen, as a grown-up, to the message that someone we want is not interested in us.

And we take our bill and disappointment and chalk it up to life and learning experience.

As Dropkick said, most of us would not sell our integrity for a bill of $45. If we do, then that's all our integrity is worth to us.

Ras 06-10-2005 11:56 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by fusion99...Yesterday, I had a lunch date that I set with a cute little chick, whom I met at the gym on Wednesday.
Quote:

Originally posted by bideau ....and a daughter who goes to the gym.
Is it me, or, does anybody see a coincidence here?

mikiemo83 06-10-2005 11:57 AM

Re: Re: Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
You ask really good questions. Why am I thinking that you have a daughter?
yes, a daughter and a lot of nieces.

I never did a chew and screw in my life, I dated too many waitresses and heard about how they are sometimes forced to pay. also why I am a generous tipper.

I like how Fusion was honest and laid everything (but the girl) out in the open. We knew about the stop on the way and other aspects of the date that most men would have hid making themselves LOOK GOOD

B A Rabbit 06-10-2005 11:57 AM

1 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice



And we take our bill and disappointment and chalk it up to life and learning experience.



FallingAlice 06-10-2005 12:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Hawg73

For the record, I think he should have dropped the extra 35 and gone for a revenge fu@k even if it didn't happen that day.


Exactly. See..that's what a smart man does.

Nine times out of ten it works. :thumb:

Seriously, I have many friends who ultimately married men that they didn't appreciate or even like on the first date.

This is why women are often attracted to older/mature men. They're so much smarter about these things.

bideau 06-10-2005 12:02 PM

A couple of points here:

First, we don't know how old Fusion is, but assuming drinks were being ordered, he's at least 21. At that age, I would expect the maturity level to be quite a bit higher.

Second, we only have his side of the story. Yeah, she may be a "gym whore", as was so gracefully pointed out. But she may be an ordinary woman who has very little sense of etiquette.

Whatever, it was an incredibly immature and classless way of handling it. Walk way with class, put her on the "do not call" list and make sure the rest of the gym hears about what happened.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 12:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Supkem
Brilliant. Truly brilliant. How did you find that so fast?

mikiemo83 06-10-2005 12:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
Seriously, I have many friends who ultimately married men that they didn't appreciate or even like on the first date.

If there was a second date,

your right about a man growing on a woman, how else does it explain a lineman built man like me marrying a triathlete. I was like mold on bread, I grew on her with my wit and charm and average looks

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 12:05 PM

Re: Re: Re: Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Quote:

Originally posted by mikiemo83

I like how Fusion was honest and laid everything (but the girl) out in the open. We knew about the stop on the way and other aspects of the date that most men would have hid making themselves LOOK GOOD

Well, honesty counts for something I suppose.

The older you get, the more you realize that careful behavior and careful disclosure count for a lot more.

Especially if you want to get laid.

bideau 06-10-2005 12:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ras-Al-Ghul
Is it me, or, does anybody see a coincidence here?
I guarantee you that if it was my daughter, she would have hunted him down and run his boxers up a flagpole as a warning to anyone else. She does not take BS from anyone.

Darth Despot 06-10-2005 12:12 PM

Interesting thread, I wanted to respond to something slightly off topic but also in a way related.

I think it was Alice who said women would rather bed a gentleman than a pig. In my experience this may nat actually be the case.

Back in my club hopping days I noticed a phenomenon which to this day still don't understand.

There were guys in the clubs how could have been wearing a tattoo across their forheads saying "I am a self-centered, concieted asshat who is only here to get in your pants", and said guys had women dripping off them.

On more than one occasion I was told I was just too nice.

So, can any of our female posters enlighten me on this?

Ras 06-10-2005 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Benign Despot
So, can any of our female posters enlighten me on this?
They can't, it is one of the most, deepest and darkest rule of being.

mgoblue101415 06-10-2005 12:15 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
There are certain rule differences between lunch and dinner dates? Do please enumerate them for me. I'll be fascinated to hear them.

Whoever said that a women has a right to walk away from a date because a man is being a creep or idiot and stick them with the bill they promised they'd pay?

Now... any woman (or man) has every right and responsibility to walk away from a date if they're feeling abused or threatened.

But I think we've all been on dates that turned out to be less than what we wanted. Most of us stick it out. And behave decently and find a way to communicate -- with some sensitivity --sometime during or afterward that, sorry, I'm just not interested. Or alternately, we have to listen, as a grown-up, to the message that someone we want is not interested in us.

And we take our bill and disappointment and chalk it up to life and learning experience.

As Dropkick said, most of us would not sell our integrity for a bill of $45. If we do, then that's all our integrity is worth to us.

There are coffee dates, lunch dates, dinner dates, and there are unwritten rules at each.

Coffee dates - You order coffee or tea, maybe a piece of pie or a muffin, but nothing more.

Lunch dates - more casual than a dinner date. Alcohol is rarely ever ordered but in the instances it is, it should only be 1 drink. That is unless of course when making the date you say something along the lines of "would you like to go grab a drink? We can head out to lunch or something." Or if you make the lunch date at a sports bar. Expect drinking in that case as well. Lunch is usually a lighter meal, usually no appetizers.

Dinner dates - expect on laying some cash down. Appetizer, drinks, meal, maybe some dessert.

I usually try to follow the rule of ordering how the payee is ordering. If they order a drink then I will as well. But if the payee is ordering a soda or water, then I won't order alcohol. If they ask if you'd like an appetizer then I feel free to order one, if I'm in the mood for one. If the subject is not brought up then I don't even consider an appetizer.

And maybe I don't have a problem with fusion walking out because I've known a few people who have done it. Some have paid for the entire bill and called it a night, but some have simply apologized, stated what a disaster the evening is, laid down their portion of the bill and walked out. Isn't it better to have a person do that rather than having that person attempt to slit their wrists with a butter knife in order to end the misery they're experiencing?

Hell, I've been on dates, where the guy was paying, and the night was such a living hell that I gave him my portion of the check and walked out.

I guess some people just have a higher tolerance for misery than others. :shrug:

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 12:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by mgoblue101415
There are coffee dates, lunch dates, dinner dates, and there are unwriten rules at each.

Coffee dates - You order coffee or tea, maybe a piece of pie or a muffin, but nothing more.

Lunch dates - more casual than a dinner date. Alcohol is rarely ever ordered but in the instances it is, it should only be 1 drink. That is unless of course when making the date you say something along the lines of "would you like to go grab a drink? We can head out to lunch or something." Or if you make the lunch date at a sports bar. Expect drinking in that case as well. Lunch is usually a lighter meal, usually no appetizers.

Dinner dates - expect on laying some cash down. Appetizer, drinks, meal, maybe some dessert.

I usually try to follow the rule of ordering how the payee is ordering. If they order a drink then I will as well. But if the payee is ordering a soda or water, then I won't order alcohol. If they ask if you'd like an appetizer then I feel free to order one, if I'm in the mood for one. If the subject is not brought up then I don't even consider an appetizer.

And maybe I don't have a problem with fusion walking out because I've known a few people who have done it. Some have paid for the entire bill and called it a night, but some have simply apologized, stated what a disaster the evening is, laid down their portion of the bill and walked out. Isn't it better to have a person do that rather than having that person attempt to slit their wrists with a butter knife in order to end the misery they're experiencing?

Hell, I've been on dates, where the guy was paying, and the night was such a living hell that I gave him my portion of the check and walked out.

I guess some people just have a higher tolerance for misery than others. :shrug:

MGO, I feel the same way as you do. Maybe it is a generational thing, but As I read your post, it made the most sense to me. :thumb:

*edit - the thing that they have an issue with in this (and I agree in the real world over my fantasy of the situation) is that he ditched her. so, she thought he was still there and he took off. That in hindsight is and was wrong.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 12:19 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Supkem
I don't know, I think she was a heifer.

Maybe This fission guy made the rest of the story up to hide his inadequacies concerning seafood. I mean who goes to a seafood resturant and orders Chicken?

He sould have ordered the Scrood and told her that he loved Fish, LOVED IT! can't get enough of it! That would have sent a signal to the Girl of what he was looking for. Instead he balked. "I'll have the Aztec Chicken" Right there she new the guy wasn't for real and she wasn't going to be Satisfied. Why not get something out of the deal? I don't blame her.

How could I have missed this classic post? How?

For the record, I disagree with Ken. I'm thinking that this might be post of the year... if for the only fact that it's so brilliant, goofy and veiled.

Kudos to you Supkem!

And yes, any man who's a real seafood lover is walking around with a huge comparative advantage over his competition. Especially if he doesn't have a huge comparative advantage otherwise.

Spinal Tap 06-10-2005 12:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
You, Spinal, are the perfect patsy for that kind of woman.

If you imagine that your incredibly demeaning attitudes toward the opposite sex don't play out -- clearly -- to women, then you're wrong.

Alice, I respect you a lot, but you're way off base here. I don't have a demeaning attitude towards the opposite sex. What I do have is a pretty good idea of what kind of girl, in particular, our man Fusion went out with.

You, somehow, have pontificated some master plan that this girl had going into the date. Like she planned out the whole thing and got exactly what she wanted (less the $40 bill). I think that she initially tried to really be nice and make a good impression. Then she got a couple of stiff drinks in her and the true slut came out to play.

See Alice, there's always another point of view.

Ras 06-10-2005 12:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
This is why women are often attracted to older/mature men. They're so much smarter about these things.
I always thought they were after their Social Security checks!

Back in the very late 70's and early 80's I was a crowd control facilitator at a local night spot, Suggler's Den, and saw many, many attempts at picking up girls and guys.

The best delivery and attempt I ever witnessed was from a regular that everyone liked. He was a local attorney and barfly. About 5'4" and weighed about 130lbs. and about 60-65yrs. old.

Once a weekend he would leave with a member of the opposite. Sometime, prior to him leave, I would notice talking to several ladies and they would scream with laughter or be repulsed at his comments. One time I asked him what he said.

He told me that he would go up to a girl/lady and tell them that he was too old to go through all the BS in trying to get a date with her and asked her if she would just want to go back to his place to f**k. He said he figured that the line never worked 9 out of 10 times, but that 1 time................

mgoblue101415 06-10-2005 12:23 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Benign Despot
Interesting thread, I wanted to respond to something slightly off topic but also in a way related.

I think it was Alice who said women would rather bed a gentleman than a pig. In my experience this may nat actually be the case.

Back in my club hopping days I noticed a phenomenon which to this day still don't understand.

There were guys in the clubs how could have been wearing a tattoo across their forheads saying "I am a self-centered, concieted asshat who is only here to get in your pants", and said guys had women dripping off them.

On more than one occasion I was told I was just too nice.

So, can any of our female posters enlighten me on this?


My husband suffered the same fate.

He'd always go to clubs (before we met) with this scumbag friend of his. Well, nice guy, just a scumbag to women. Anyway, this guy would always end up with quite a few women around him while my poor, nice hubby was left woman-less.

And speaking as a woman.... I always went for the gorgeous, rich, great body guys, who of course, 99% of the time wer actually jerks. I actually broke up with a guy by telling him he was too nice. Treated me like a queen but always had to be with me. Way too clingy. I guess I preferred a guy who ignored me to a guy who hung on me. :shrug:

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 12:24 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Spinal Tap
Alice, I respect you a lot, but you're way off base here. I don't have a demeaning attitude towards the opposite sex. What I do have is a pretty good idea of what kind of girl, in particular, our man Fusion went out with.

You, somehow, have pontificated some master plan that this girl had going into the date. Like she planned out the whole thing and got exactly what she wanted (less the $40 bill). I think that she initially tried to really be nice and make a good impression. Then she got a couple of stiff drinks in her and the true slut came out to play.

See Alice, there's always another point of view.

Well, I was curious about her view of the girl too (she didn't respond to my post, but it was at the end of a page which people usually miss.)

I think Alice has a valid point, but not completely. Not every man or woman is the same. There are bad men and there are also bad women. Though her views of this young man are well known, I was curious as to her thoughts on the young lady's behavior.

B A Rabbit 06-10-2005 12:25 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
Brilliant. Truly brilliant. How did you find that so fast?
Thank you for your praise, on both accounts. Just luckey I guess.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 12:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dirtywater
Well, there lies the difference between us. I would have upset that he skipped out on the bill (the Dad in me) and I would have been upset that he left a young woman without a ride, but mortified? Nope. It takes two to tango and they were both wrong.

Now, talk to me about her behavior. You've let your feelings be known about the guy. Being female does not make one without faults.

I'm curious for your take on her behaivor?


...And UT, this thread is a healthy debate, no need to the lock.

I think Bideau's reading on her behavior is correct. She may well be an immature and unsophisticated young woman.

Those are the chances you take when you offer to treat someone to lunch.

Being an immature and unsophisticated young woman pales in comparison to running out on a check and failing to meet your promise.

And I'm sorry, but while she could use a lesson in manners, it's not as if she bought the house at No. 9 Park or Pigalle.

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
I think Bideau's reading on her behavior is correct. She may well be an immature and unsophisticated young woman.

Those are the chances you take when you offer to treat someone to lunch.

Being an immature and unsophisticated young woman pales in comparison to running out on a check and failing to meet your promise.

And I'm sorry, but while she could use a lesson in manners, it's not as if she bought the house at No. 9 Park or Pigalle.

:D Cool, thanks!

Now if she was my daughter, I would have told her that if she was not interested in the hot-for-sex young man, that she should not take advantage of the situation by ordering so much because it todays day and age it could provoke some bad behavior (a lot worse than diching.)

I would have told her to simply act nice and get the date over with. And that she could call me anytime, no questions asked for a ride if she felt uncomfortable with his behavior.

mikiemo83 06-10-2005 12:38 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dirtywater

I And that she could call me anytime, no questions asked for a ride if she felt uncomfortable with his behavior.

best advice a parent can give their child in many different phases of life.

One thing to remember they will call as long as when they do call you don't flip out on them. Use it as a teaching tool the next morning without the "I told you so."

mgoblue101415 06-10-2005 12:42 PM

One of my best-friend's mother would always make sure we had at least $2 on us whenever we went out with guys, that way we could always call a cab if we felt uncomfortable or things started going badly.

Course, I'm not sure she was aware the cab fares have gone up a bit since her day.

Still, good advice. But make sure it's $20 and not $2. ;)

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 12:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Spinal Tap
Alice, I respect you a lot, but you're way off base here. I don't have a demeaning attitude towards the opposite sex. What I do have is a pretty good idea of what kind of girl, in particular, our man Fusion went out with.


You don't need to listen to me. Just go back and read your own post describing women.

Quote:

You, somehow, have pontificated some master plan that this girl had going into the date. Like she planned out the whole thing and got exactly what she wanted (less the $40 bill). I think that she initially tried to really be nice and make a good impression. Then she got a couple of stiff drinks in her and the true slut came out to play.

See Alice, there's always another point of view.
First of all, if you didn't see my "story" as a fictional, satirical send-up intended to disabuse good ole Fusion of some very naive attitudes about women, then you need to learn to read between the lines.

Second, if your scenario is correct, then Fusion looks even worse. Because maybe during the course of lunch he just succeeded in totally turning the woman off. I find her behavior far more irritating if she simply went out with the guy knowing that she didn't want to.

And yes, there is always another point of view. As Fusion just learned, much (as I imagine) to his chagrin and embarrassment on this thread.

Again...men who view and talk about women in the way that you and Fusion seem to are usually the dumb clucks who are attracted and attract those same women. This said, they usually fit your desired profile to a T and meet your expectations perfectly.

I personally know of no woman (young or old) who would behave the way this young woman behaved. But they're not generally attracted to men like Fusion.

A woman of much character will see and read his attitude a mile away and run like hell in the opposite direction.

We tend to seek and find water at our level. In Fusion's case, it's a low-level, indeed. That is probably the best thing I can say in his defense.

PatsFanDan 06-10-2005 12:44 PM

I'm pretty late to the party as well here, but here's my thoughts:

1) The girl is either an idiot or something else that I will refrain from calling her out of respect for the ladies on this board.

2) Factoid #1 was not a good enough reason to walk out on the tab. I have no problem if you want to end the date at that point but at least pay the friggin' tab. If this girl had no cash, then it's the restaurant and the wait staff that got screwed.

And a few other random thoughts from the thread...

Are there really women who will go out with a guy just because they are afraid to tell him they are not interested? Please ladies, don't waste both of our times.

Lastly, I would have no problem spending $30-40 on a woman in this situation if I was genuinely interested in her. Of course, I'm not living on a minimum wage salary and I don't know what the situation is here in Fusions case. The point being, if money is not an obstacle....what is the big deal?

And I called the girl an idiot because of that ex-boyfriend comment. If that was the truth, she should have lied. And if that was an excuse, she should have come up with something better.

spiderman 06-10-2005 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Benign Despot
There were guys in the clubs how could have been wearing a tattoo across their forheads saying "I am a self-centered, concieted asshat who is only here to get in your pants", and said guys had women dripping off them.

On more than one occasion I was told I was just too nice.

It's true. Anytime I've acted overly nice towards women I've been rejected.

Anytime I've acted arrogant or aloof, the opposite has been the case.

For example, one time I gave a woman my business card and told her where I hang out on Saturday nights. My buddy thought it was the biggest dick move he'd ever seen and kept making fun of me for the rest of the night about how I'd totally insulted the woman.

Well sure enough Saturday afternoon she called, and drove about 30 minutes to meet me at the bar.

I'm not bragging just lending personal evidence towards Despot hypothesis. :D

bideau 06-10-2005 12:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by mikiemo83
best advice a parent can give their child in many different phases of life.

One thing to remember they will call as long as when they do call you don't flip out on them. Use it as a teaching tool the next morning without the "I told you so."

Except that doesn't work if your daughter is nearly 700 miles away.

Yes, I do worry. But my daughter has developed a pretty good a$$hole radar and she has plenty of friends at school who are just a phone call away.

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 12:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by bideau
Except that doesn't work if your daughter is nearly 700 miles away.

Yes, I do worry. But my daughter has developed a pretty good a$$hole radar and she has plenty of friends at school who are just a phone call away.

Bideau,

It sounds to me that you raised a great, well-adjusted young woman. Though you can't be there to pick her up anymore, you gave her the tools to know what and how to do the right thing.

Kudos.

dchester 06-10-2005 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by spiderman
It's true. Anytime I've acted overly nice towards women I've been rejected.

Anytime I've acted arrogant or aloof, the opposite has been the case.

I think it's true that an awful lot of women are attracted to confident, dominent men (although a lot of those women are not compatible with that type of guy). But remember, not all women are attracted to a-holes, but you do need to have a certain amount of confidence to get into the game.

Another thing is, don't get too attracted to a girl too quickly (granted, that's easier said than done once the blood leaves the brain for "elsewhere"). Don't come on too strong (i.e. often times, a single rose is better than a dozen).

The key thing, is to make sure that you are both trying to make the budding relationship work, and if not, just move on and try again with someone else.
________
vaporizer manufacturer

bideau 06-10-2005 12:56 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dirtywater
Bideau,

It sounds to me that you raised a great, well-adjusted young woman. Though you can't be there to pick her up anymore, you gave her the tools to know what and how to do the right thing.

Kudos.

Thanks for the kind words, DW.

As parents, we all do the best we can to lay a solid, moral foundation. At some point, we have to trust that they've learned something and just cross our fingers. Ultimately, the final decisions rest with them and we hope that they learn from their inevitable mistakes.

How come we didn't listen to our parents when they used to say, "Wait until you're a parent someday, then you'll understand".

Undertaker #59* 06-10-2005 01:08 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Dirtywater
...And UT, this thread is a healthy debate, no need to the lock.
So far, yes.

I go to lunch and I am 3 pages behind....jeez.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 01:11 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Benign Despot
Interesting thread, I wanted to respond to something slightly off topic but also in a way related.

I think it was Alice who said women would rather bed a gentleman than a pig. In my experience this may nat actually be the case.

Back in my club hopping days I noticed a phenomenon which to this day still don't understand.

There were guys in the clubs how could have been wearing a tattoo across their forheads saying "I am a self-centered, concieted asshat who is only here to get in your pants", and said guys had women dripping off them.

On more than one occasion I was told I was just too nice.

So, can any of our female posters enlighten me on this?

Interesting question. Here's my take.

I'm personally attracted to a man who has an "edge." I don't want to date Mr. Rogers. At the same time, I don't want to be leered at and seen as a screw-toy.

There is plenty of grey area between those two extremes.

A person who is overly accommodating can sometimes seem either week or smarmy and it's not attractive.

At the same time, I've met many gentlemen and ladies who have a strong sense of self, strong boundaries and are never overly accommodating. In fact, those qualities tend to go together.

They are always extremely attractive people. No matter their physical appearance.

KenJr30 06-10-2005 01:15 PM

I did not read all the posts but I'll drop my latest $.02 worth.

So my advice to fusion is what my mom always told me growing up. Expect nothing (in fusion's case:booty) and never be disappointed. I think Hawg hit it on the head, he should have paid the extra $35 and tried to get lucky with her at a later date. He is outta luck now! Just my thoughts.

FallingAlice 06-10-2005 01:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by mgoblue101415
And maybe I don't have a problem with fusion walking out because I've known a few people who have done it. Some have paid for the entire bill and called it a night, but some have simply apologized, stated what a disaster the evening is, laid down their portion of the bill and walked out. Isn't it better to have a person do that rather than having that person attempt to slit their wrists with a butter knife in order to end the misery they're experiencing?


The scenario you desribe to me up there is different...really different... than what Fusion describes doing.

In fact, I have a whole lot of respect for someone who could be that forthright and then act accordingly. That's decent enough. It may be a little too bald-faced for some people, but it's honest.

What Fusion is describing is a man who expects sex for money, his disappointment over not getting what he wanted and how he behaved afterward.

Spinal Tap 06-10-2005 01:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
Again...men who view and talk about women in the way that you and Fusion seem to are usually the dumb clucks who are attracted and attract those same women. This said, they usually fit your desired profile to a T and meet your expectations perfectly.
Well, there goes that respect thing I spoke of earlier. You don't know me from a f**king hole in the wall, so don't pretend to.

B A Rabbit 06-10-2005 01:30 PM

Re: OT: Renegged on paying the tab for my lunch date yesterday. (long post)
 
Some how I figure there has to be another side to the story. And since the young lady isn't here to defend herself, I'll state her side of the story.

Quote:

It's only been a week since My Boyfriend got arrested for indecent assult. Today's his trail and his 2 daughter keep me up all night. I'm Tired and hungry, and want nothing more than to go back to bed, but I can't. I made a promise to this cute guy I met outside the Gym last week while changing a falt tire on my Geo Metro.
He talked so much I would have said anything to get rid of him just so I could get back on with my day.

Surfice it to say, All was not going well. I was surprized when he asked me what my favorite resturant was. and even more so when he again offered to pay. This guys a sap I told myself. Proberly only wants to get laid. Something I just don't have the time for nowadays. But if he wants to pay, Who am I to look a gift horse in the mouth.

We arrive at Red Lobster, and All I can think about is how I'm going to have to raise Yolanda and Vivian if my boyfriend gets convited.

By the time the waiter arrives all I can think about is throwing back a couple of stiff ones. I give him a meaningful look, But he seems more concerned with my cleavage then with me, so I order a frozen peach margarita with flavored salt around the rim. I don't even notice that all he orded was a coke.

Some how, It's nice to know that some people aren't as burderned by life as others.

I try and make small talk with this guy, but the more he yaks the more I realize He's only out for one thing. And I just ain't in the mood, suger.

When the waiter comes back, I enquire about several items on the menu, gaugeing my dates response. But he's still more preocipied with my bust and dosen't make a move, quiver, or raise an Eyebrow. Knowing how hungrey I was and knowing I still had two small mouths to feed after school, I ordered the quesadillas, a bowl of clam chowder and, the New England platter. I'm not really a dessert person, But that fried Cheesecake looked awfully good.

He gets the Aztec Chicken.

WTF?!??

Does this guy eat at these types of resturants all the time? I haen't been out to a place like this since before I met, D.J. QuadKiller. Yolanda's daddie
I decide to order another Margaritta to let him know what I'm all about.

I try and let him know what is going on with my life, But as the night goes on, He seems less and less Interested.

I Ask for box so I could take home my leftovers and I noticed his sigh and smirk. what a concerted Jerk this guy is turning out to be. If he had a probelm with what I was ordering, He should have let his feeling be known BEFORE I ordered it, Not after.

I have no idea what the bill came to, And as I Finish my second margarita he has become incredibly annoying to converse with. All semblance of normal, worthwhile conversation went where that Aztec Chicken will end up once they've travelled through this Dickwad's digestive system.

Then he gets really stupid and says: "I've had a great time with you. Perhaps you'd like to go to your place and spend some more time together, talking and getting to know each other," What nerve! I've known since this guy picked me up that all he wanted was to get inside my size 0 thong, BUT NOW he Suggests going back to MY place?!?!?

That was the last straw, "I have to pick up my ex-boyfriend from the court house in an hour. His Momma dropped him off, but I'm his only ride back." I lie.

Game over.


I figure this guy's out the door at this point. And I'm going to have do the same thing I did last time I went out for dinner. Cry until the manager lets me go.

I watch as he walks around back and gets in his car, and leaves and the tears start falling. Soon now my getaway will be complete, both literally and figuratively.

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by FallingAlice
The scenario you desribe to me up there is different...really different... than what Fusion describes doing.

In fact, I have a whole lot of respect for someone who could be that forthright and then act accordingly. That's decent enough. It may be a little too bald-faced for some people, but it's honest.

What Fusion is describing is a man who expects sex for money, his disappointment over not getting what he wanted and how he behaved afterward.

Ah, I think I now see the main difference. I read it as in "he is a young guy guy, and most guys are looking to get laid."

You read it as, "He wanted to trade the dinner for action."

Since he yet to post a follow up, I'll reserve judgement, but if it went down as you comprehended it, then yes, I don't agree with him.

That being said, 2 wrongs (his sexual assumptions and her I'll order the menu) don't make a right.

Anyway, good chat.

Dirtywater 06-10-2005 01:34 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Spinal Tap
Well, there goes that respect thing I spoke of earlier. You don't know me from a f**king hole in the wall, so don't pretend to.
I agree with your overall sentiment here, though without the harsh words. You can't judge someone completely because of a post in an online forum. There is a lot more to a person than how they felt when they typed 3 or 4 sentences.

Sometimes it is hard to convey your thoughts well too in a post.


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