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-   The Oedipus Tex Classic Thread Forum (http://www.patriotsplanet.com/BB/forumdisplay.php?f=12)
-   -   RIP Thomas Alexander Brantley (http://www.patriotsplanet.com/BB/showthread.php?t=12020)

Annihilus 08-09-2005 03:40 PM

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TheYellowDart 08-09-2005 03:55 PM

Great work on that Anni. I am at a lost for words as to what to say about this news. Truly awful.

RIP OED

sir_drinkalot 08-09-2005 05:28 PM

Didn't know him.

Felt like I did. He shared his trials and tribulations with us and even asked for advice. May he rest in peace. Though I'll never understand how someone could take their own life, I'll always admire the man.

stainlee 08-09-2005 06:24 PM

very sad news.

my thoughts and prayers to tex's family and friends.

it definately made me laugh quite a bit reading some of his posts and threads.

he will be missed.

bideau 08-09-2005 06:36 PM

Unless someone has suffered from or knows someone who has suffered from severe clinical depression, they have no way of comprehending the emotional pain that these poor people suffer every waking moment. I've witnessed it in the suicide of a 16 yr old friend of my daughter who had suffered depression from early childhood. It was a helpless feeling to witness it. It was stunning to find out that the note she left behind said she had never been happier than at that moment.

Oed was not my personal friend, he was my internet friend. I have no right to stand in judgement of his actions. I'm choosing to remember him from his Planet postings. I'll miss his odd insights and British take on American politics. I'll think of his family and friends who are no doubt wondering what they could have done differently. And I'll hope that he found peace from the demons that this illness inflicts on its victims who so desperately try to escape them.

Rest in Peace Oed and bless those that you left behind.

#54 08-09-2005 06:46 PM

I stumbled across the Planet last preseason and lurked here all year. Oed will always be one of my favorite posters. He made me think, about football and life. He made me fall out of my chair laughing quite a few times and he had me shaking my head in bewilderment, too.
I didn't know him, never talked to him, but from reading his posts I grew to respect and like him.
Oed, I hope you are now at peace and I hope you know that you reached what so many of us want. Immortality. Your words will live forever on this board and more importantly...in our hearts.

dchester 08-09-2005 09:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Spinal Tap
This is crushing news. My condolensces go out to his family. I am truly saddened by this tragic news.

However, and I know I'll probably be chastized for saying this, but I have a real problem with honoring someone who takes their own life. This may not be the time nor the place to express these views. But I thought that we should all take a step back and think about what Tex's actions have done to his family and close friends. Again, this is awkward but it's the way I feel. I'm angry.

I just feel bad that he didn't feel he had anyone that he could turn to. I remember when he turned to us with his delimna over making "the switch". It was part funny and serious at the same time. Some of us tried to be supportive, and other were quite critical and judgemental, although none of us had a clue about the depths of his inner turmoil.

I know that the next time someone really posts in need, I'll make a better attempt to be supportive.

Tex, I hope you've found some peace, but I still feel quite sad about this.
________
Yamaha OX99-11 specifications

PatsFanDan 08-09-2005 10:36 PM

I've avoided this thread all day because I really just don't know what to say. Like most here, I knew Tex only thru his posts. But it was obvious he was a bright guy who had a lot to offer. He will be missed on the board but more importantly he will be missed by his family and friends. My condolensces to them in this difficult time.

Spinal Tap 08-10-2005 07:14 AM

I liked Tex very much. I never knew he even had a problem with depression. He always seemed like a happy person who really had a lot going for him. He got to travel the world for his job. He had a girlfriend that seemed to care about him an awful lot. I think I'm just kinda shocked at the news of his suicide.

My condolensces go out to Tex's family and friends.

TrueBeliever 08-10-2005 09:43 AM

Yeah, I've been avoiding this thread too. I'm still gradually adjusting to my mom being gone; then Peter Jennings dies, and now suddenly one of the Planeteers. And now, as I write this, I hear Barbara Bel Geddes (who played Miss Ellie on Dallas ) has died. It's like since Mom went every time I hear of the death of someone I at all knew it's a punch in the gut.

I'd like to add a little to what bideau said earlier. Unfortunately, our society still has a good way to go in understanding mental illness. A gal I work with, for example, used to say, "If people want to kill themselves, we should just let them because they're just losers anyway." Then a friend of her family's shot himself. Needless to say, she changed her tune.

People who commit suicide aren't "losers", they just don't have the capability to deal with things the way that mentally healthy people do. A guy who went to my high school (and to my college for a semester) shot himself one night during winter break after he went to a nightclub and someone did a minor hit-and-run fender-bender on his car, for God's sake.

I would also like to talk a bit about what we called the "Internet will". At one of the boards I used to post at, one of the Pats forum moderators died unexpectedly of a heart attack (I think she was only in her early 40s). All they knew was that all of a sudden she just stopped posting; it was weeks before they were finally able to find out who she really was and learned what happened to her.

After that, it was suggested to us that everyone should have a person they know in real life (not just on the Internet) who could go on to the websites they go on to and notify people if they died or were in an accident, etc. The soon-to-be Mrs. TB and I have done this to an extent, writing down our handles and passwords for any websites involving financial information. Haven't gone as far yet as to tell her about my Planet info and my log-on as beeradvocate.com, etc., but it's probably not a bad idea.

My condolences to Tex's family. What awful news.

Flagg the Wanderer 08-10-2005 09:46 AM

Just thought I'd pass this along, guys:

Ken -

I wanted to thank you for your support recently, and ask you to pass my thanks along to the people at Patriots Planet. Could you post this? Thanks.

Hi, Planet.
You all don't know me, but I'm Shannon Finneran, girlfriend of "Oedipus Tex." When "Flagg" first told me that he posted the news here, I was a little pissed off. But tonight I went to look at the thread, and seeing all of your reactions to Tom's death really did me some good.
Sometimes, each of us is in our own little world, and we forget how much of an effect each of us has on everyone around us, no matter how minor our contact seems to be.

It's been almost two weeks now, and I'm still struggling to make sense of this. I understand that Tom was sick, and suffering, but he had a successful business that many his age would have killed to have, parents who loved him, and my family absolutely adored him. I know you all know the history between Tom, Erin, and myself. Ask yourself how many fathers that you know would love and accept a daughter's (daughters'? forgive my grammar, Tom) boyfriend who did this. (To be fair, I had more than a little hand in that, as you all know.)

Tom was an amazing person. He had the gift that few have of talking to people on their own level without ever talking down to them. I was with him when he absolutely skewered a guy who was bragging about mensa membership...but after putting the guy firmly in his place, they left as friends. You know the saying "It's not what you say, but how you say it?" Tom had the gift of making people laugh at themselves, and appreciate him for pointing it out. He used it beautifully in his business - picture that he had been running a business in international trade consulting since before his 25th birthday! To do that, you need to make people trust you, and know that you have something valuable to contribute.

But mostly, he loved people. I never knew him to put himself above another person - whether the person was a close friend or a stranger. When he drove, he was the guy that slowed down to let people in ahead of him. One time on a date, he gave up our reservations to a couple behind us who he overheard stressing about making a movie after dinner.

It may have been this that ate him up more than anything. He forever put himself second. He had a good deal of survivor guilt from Thailand. People say that suicide is selfish, and I understand that (boy do I understand that...) But from his perspective he could never give enough, he could never help enough. Hell, he felt guilty of the time he spent here.

Look, Tom was no saint. If it wasn't for his well-developed conscience, he would have been a womanizer without peer. He wanted to please people so badly that he tended to hide unpleasant truths (in his personal life, not his business life) until he was boxed into a corner. When he was down, he tended to miss appointments, deadlines, dates...even days. And then he scrambled like hell to fix everything just before it all was totally lost.

His depression was an eye opener for me. When he was dating Erin, she once came out of work to find him asleep in the back of her car in his boxers. He said he'd been there for about six hours. In the end, he lived his life with his emotions on his sleeve. I'm not suprised there was no note - none was needed.

I do know that he had fun here and thought very highly of both the general level of intelligence and thoughtfulness (in terms of thinking things through) of the people on this board. I appreciate your kind words during this difficult time. I am sorry for all of you that only knew Tom as Tex. You missed more than you can ever know.

Thank you, and be good to yourselves.
Shannon.

Annihilus 08-10-2005 10:05 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Flagg Wanderer
Tom was an amazing person.

Thank you, and be good to yourselves.
Shannon.

It sounds like Tom/Oed was as cool a guy in real life as he was on the 'Net. That's not too surprising to Annihilus. His personality shined through his words here and will be missed. Many of us were truly distressed when we heard about his going missing in Thailand and this news obviously hits us that much harder.

Thanks for posting that Flagg.

dchester 08-10-2005 10:54 AM

Thanks Shannon for taking the time to share some of your thoughts with us. I'm really sorry for your loss.
________
starcraft replays

NCPATRIOT 08-10-2005 10:55 AM

This news is so sad. May he rest in peace. My thoughts and prayers will be with him and his family. Thanks so much for posting this..

mgoblue101415 08-10-2005 11:22 AM

For the most part, the majority of us around here have never met, yet spending day in and day out chatting with each other, arguing, laughing, and sharing thoughts, there is a small relationship that is formed. You get a chance to know people, or at least the side that they let you see. And while Tom obviously had problems we around here were unaware of, Tex was the source of many laughs and memorable discussions. His wit and humor were truly unique, and will be missed, but definitely not forgotten. How many of us can keep ourselves from laughing anytime owls or sisters are mentioned? I doubt many.

I pray he has found peace and I pray for all his family, friends, and loved ones. May they find strength and comfort.


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