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shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 02:43 PM

This Is A Thread Where We Talk About Secks
 
After reading the Cassel thread, obviously the tone it down thing is gettin people edgy.

Rules of the thread. Secks talk is ok.
Hijacking is ok.

Basically the first rule of secks thread is there are no rules.

johnlocke 01-10-2009 02:48 PM

pussy

How's that? I done good, right?

midgar8784 01-10-2009 02:49 PM

You can take your thread and stick it straight in your.....:jester:

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 02:53 PM

<object width="464" height="376"><param name="movie" value="http://embed.break.com/643732"></param><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://embed.break.com/643732" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowScriptAccess="always" width="464" height="376"></embed></object><br><font size=1><a href="http://www.break.com/index/sexy-french-game-show.html">Sexy French Game Show</a> - Watch more <a href="http://www.break.com/">Free Videos</a></font>

I just borrowed this from the metal polishing thread. mmmm, wrap those legs around that cylinder girls!:D

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by midgar8784 (Post 1042602)
You can take your thread and stick it straight in your.....:jester:

I've tried sticking a thread in it before....:shake:

RoadGrader 01-10-2009 02:55 PM

Quote:

<cite>Russ</cite> Says:
<small class="commentmetadata">January 8th, 2009 at 2:38 pm </small>

Crew for Chargers@Steelers:


Referee-Bill Leavy #127
Umpire-Darrell Jenkins #76(Leavy)
HL-Mark Baltz #26 (Leavy)
LJ-Mark Pearlman #9 (Leavy)
SJ-Dave Wyant #16 (Triplette)
BJ-Kieth Ferguson #61 (Leavy)
FJ-Doug Rosenbaum #67 (Green)
ALT Referee-Jeff Triplette #42
ALT SJ-Joe Larrew #73 (Riveron)
http://www.football-refs.com/2008/12...e-assignments/

[ / Toning-IT-Down Tips&Tricks for Football Forums©®™ ]

TomWaits & you 01-10-2009 03:00 PM

Mr. Simms: Do you have any experience?
Robbie: No, sir, I have no experience but I'm a big fan... I like it, I use it, I have a little. I keep it in a jar on top of my refrigerator. I'd like to put more in that jar. That's where you come in.

http://videodetective.com/photos/176/007394_14.jpg

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 03:00 PM

Celibacy FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RoadGrader (Post 1042607)
http://www.football-refs.com/2008/12...e-assignments/

[ / Toning-IT-Down Tips&Tricks for Football Forums©®™ ]

I bet the Chargers make the Steelers their bitches. They'll bend the steelers over and...

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by RoadGrader (Post 1042607)
http://www.football-refs.com/2008/12...e-assignments/

[ / Toning-IT-Down Tips&Tricks for Football Forums©®™ ]

Why do people think cats are cute? Ever see a hairball barfed up on the floor?

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042615)
Celibacy FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

www.cutethingsfallingasleep.org

wuv

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:12 PM

http://www.rofl.name/owned/owned_just_cruising.jpg

easycome_easygo 01-10-2009 03:13 PM

Is this teh thread for sinners? wuv

RoadGrader 01-10-2009 03:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042620)
Why do people think cats are cute?

http://www.t-nation.com/img/photos/2...9/image005.jpg

http://image18.webshots.com/19/5/13/...5stsPCw_ph.jpg

Fully Tilted 01-10-2009 03:14 PM

I like........boobies? :shrug:

TomWaits & you 01-10-2009 03:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042626)


Oh my.

Utilized correctly, the play of THIS website = sex.

i.e.: Ohhhh....so cute!!!! wuv (repeated 643 times). After they're suckered into your softer side, :bhump:

sleeve, you surprise me, you cunning fox. :Lecture:

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:15 PM

http://images.paraorkut.com/img/mysp...0237_funny.jpg

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042633)

I know her.

Quote:

Originally Posted by VYF (Post 1042634)
Is this teh thread for sinners? wuv

YES. Yes it is.

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:19 PM

http://www.rhinos-irf.org/tpeople/ww...20Mating-m.jpg

Pyxis 01-10-2009 03:20 PM

Ya know, it's kinda hard to say something dirty without some good bait to go after.:huh:

TomWaits & you 01-10-2009 03:21 PM

1 Attachment(s)
.

Bender 01-10-2009 03:22 PM

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/BCcaMIcwz30&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/BCcaMIcwz30&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pyxis (Post 1042655)
Ya know, it's kinda hard to say something dirty without some good bait to go after.:huh:

Bait:shake:

Only consensual adults please.

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 03:24 PM

1 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally Posted by Fully Tilted (Post 1042638)
I like........boobies? :shrug:

I have teh best boobies ever.wuv

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 03:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TomWaits & you (Post 1042642)
Oh my.

Utilized correctly, the play of THIS website = sex.

i.e.: Ohhhh....so cute!!!! wuv (repeated 643 times). After they're suckered into your softer side, :bhump:

sleeve, you surprise me, you cunning fox. :Lecture:

It shut down my innernetz when I clicked on it.:shrug:

And nice to see you TomWaits:hug:

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042666)
I have teh best boobies ever.wuv

I heard you have teh hottest ass, too. :coffee:

Pyxis 01-10-2009 03:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042664)
Bait:shake:

Only consensual adults please.


LOL. No, I meant bait as in thread fodder that I usually spin into a dirty comment. Not that I do it that often. I admit to being a secks talking hijacker.

easycome_easygo 01-10-2009 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042666)
I have teh best boobies ever.wuv

I think I just peed! ROFLROFLROFL

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042669)
It shut down my innernetz when I clicked on it.:shrug:

And nice to see you TomWaits:hug:

Noooez! It really is about cute things falling asleep. For teh celibacy!:)

Fully Tilted 01-10-2009 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042666)
I have teh best boobies ever.wuv

I could rent an apartment in those things! OMG





Plus, I would totally save on the heat bill. :coffee:

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VYF (Post 1042678)
I think I just peed! ROFLROFLROFL

woohoo

Oh. Wait. You did read TW's sign, right?

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:32 PM

http://www.wheelchairanglingandhamra...Vegetables.jpg

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042689)

Ummm...that carrot has Gonneria.

Bender 01-10-2009 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042692)
Ummm...that carrot has Gonneria.

Uhmm..you look at carrot penis!

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042670)
I heard you have teh hottest ass, too. :coffee:


I do, wanna see it??????wuv

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042695)
I do, wanna see it??????wuv

You do!

film at 11.

Mirror cam rules!

edit: Please, God! Dont post that chez azz you posted in the girlie pic thread!

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042695)
I do, wanna see it??????wuv

Yes please :archive:

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042699)
Yes please :archive:

OH. GOD. NO.

TomWaits & you 01-10-2009 03:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042669)
It shut down my innernetz when I clicked on it.:shrug:

And nice to see you TomWaits:hug:

Ah, thanks.

It's actually a genuinely cute site, youtube-style, of puppies, kittens, babies falling asleep.

Worth it.

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 03:42 PM

1 Attachment(s)
Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042699)
Yes please :archive:

Baby got back.

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042701)
OH. GOD. NO.

Heh heh heh

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042703)
Baby got back.

You did.

:doh::banghead::Eason:

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042705)
You did.

:doh::banghead::Eason:

ROFL :LOL:

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042701)
OH. GOD. NO.

ROFLROFL

easycome_easygo 01-10-2009 03:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042703)
Baby got back.

NOM NOM NOM

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:46 PM

So, here's a question. With that ginormous butt, and those teeny tiny short arms... how does she wipe?

Jammer 01-10-2009 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042712)
So, here's a question. With that ginormous butt, and those teeny tiny short arms... how does she wipe?

She dont ...

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042712)
So, here's a question. With that ginormous butt, and those teeny tiny short arms... how does she wipe?

She sits on a big eyed kitteh.:cool:

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 03:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042712)
So, here's a question. With that ginormous butt, and those teeny tiny short arms... how does she wipe?

What is this she stuff? You know that's really me right?:shrug: And the answer is carefully.:harumph:

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:49 PM

I bet she does like the really fat guy I used to work with - she presses her butt on teh stall wall and rubs up and down.

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042718)
What is this she stuff? You know that's really me right?:shrug: And the answer is carefully.:harumph:

ROFL

Like I said.

Film at 11.

Claremonster 01-10-2009 03:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042718)
What is this she stuff? You know that's really me right?:shrug: And the answer is carefully.:harumph:

Whatever. Either way, I'd so borrow the Jaws of Life, use it to separate those cheeks, and hit that three times.

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 03:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042730)
Whatever. Either way, I'd so borrow the Jaws of Life, use it to separate those cheeks, and hit that three times.

ROFLROFLROFL I spit my drink.

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 03:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042732)
ROFLROFLROFL I spit my drink.

Yeah!:mad: Damn you Clare!:mad:

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 04:05 PM

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/FvjziNMEYcU&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/FvjziNMEYcU&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 05:41 PM

Lets talk about secks baby.... lets talk about you and me....

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042876)
Lets talk about secks baby.... lets talk about you and me....

Lets talk about all the good things and the bad things, that may be.

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 05:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042876)
Lets talk about secks baby.... lets talk about you and me....

You dont need no short short men!>)

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 05:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042882)
You dont need no short short men!>)


Actually I do. I'm 5'.

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 05:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042889)
Actually I do. I'm 5'.

ROFL

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 05:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042889)
Actually I do. I'm 5'.

OMG You iz da short. I envy you, I'm too tall.

Claremonster 01-10-2009 05:50 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042898)
OMG You iz da short. I envy you, I'm too tall.

That's ok, I'd go up on you. :coffee:

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 05:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042901)
That's ok, I'd go up on you. :coffee:

ROFLROFL Aren't we the same height?

Claremonster 01-10-2009 05:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042905)
ROFLROFL Aren't we the same height?

So we'll get a ladder.

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 05:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042898)
OMG You iz da short. I envy you, I'm too tall.

Im a dwarf midget! You can rest your drink on my head if you like!

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 05:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042898)
OMG You iz da short. I envy you, I'm too tall.


I can do any guy tall or short... I would say all my boyfriends were tall but compared to me everyone is tall.

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 05:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042913)
I can do any guy tall or short... I would say all my boyfriends were tall but compared to me everyone is tall.

I've set a new requirement that all men in my life must be 6' or above. My ex husband and the long term BF were both just a bit taller than me. I want to wear heels dammit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 05:59 PM

I was wondering if you were going to pipe in.ROFL

WTFBBQJHDELETING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 05:59 PM

I knoooow! And they kill the feet too, dont they?:rolleyes:

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 06:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042916)
I've set a new requirement that all men in my life must be 6' or above. My ex husband and the long term BF were both just a bit taller than me. I want to wear heels dammit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


I can't wear heels, all it does is make me look like a short girl trying to look taller. The best I can get is 5'3" which is still really short. Not to mention the additional height might give me nose bleeds from lack of oxygen in the upper atmosphere. ROFL

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 06:01 PM

Hey Jh! You pulled out?!:blink:

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042923)
I knoooow! And they kill the feet too, dont they?:rolleyes:

No they do not.:harumph: They make teh legs look teh sexy.

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042925)
I can't wear heels, all it does is make me look like a short girl trying to look taller. The best I can get is 5'3" which is still really short. Not to mention the additional height might give me nose bleeds from lack of oxygen in the upper atmosphere. ROFL

You get used to it. Look at the Broncos.

Costanza 01-10-2009 06:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042926)
Hey Jh! You pulled out?!:blink:

Lol, sorry.

I've talked about being teh tall so much I didn't want to beat a dead horse, you know.

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042926)
Hey Jh! You pulled out?!:blink:


I hope you don't say that to all the girls. :shake:

Costanza 01-10-2009 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042926)
Hey Jh! You pulled out?!:blink:

I am not ready for this type of commitment :o.

tommysgirl 01-10-2009 06:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042925)
I can't wear heels, all it does is make me look like a short girl trying to look taller. The best I can get is 5'3" which is still really short. Not to mention the additional height might give me nose bleeds from lack of oxygen in the upper atmosphere. ROFL

My Mom was 5'2" and she looked like an idiot with really high heels. She just wore her little pumps and accepted it.

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 06:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jh (Post 1042930)
Lol, sorry.

I've talked about being teh tall so much I didn't want to beat a dead horse, you know.

Well this is a secks thread. But kinky animal secks?:shake: Good call!:thumb:

Costanza 01-10-2009 06:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042933)
My Mom was 5'2" and she looked like an idiot with really high heels. She just wore her little pumps and accepted it.

A lot of shorties I know wear 5 inch platforms. I would fahkin' die if I wore those things all the time. Teh dangerous.

Costanza 01-10-2009 06:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042934)
Well this is a secks thread. But kinky animal secks?:shake: Good call!:thumb:

I beleive that would go in a Bender thread.

O noes. I hope I didn't give him any ideas. :blink:

Claremonster 01-10-2009 06:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1042933)
My Mom was 5'2" and she looked like an idiot with really high heels. She just wore her little pumps and accepted it.

That's what I do.

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 06:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jh (Post 1042935)
A lot of shorties I know wear 5 inch platforms. I would fahkin' die if I wore those things all the time. Teh dangerous.


Shorties. :thwak: We are height challenged. :harumph:

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 06:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jh (Post 1042932)
I am not ready for this type of commitment :o.

tease.:harumph:

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042931)
I hope you don't say that to all the girls. :shake:


:o

Costanza 01-10-2009 06:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042939)
Shorties. :thwak: We are height challenged. :harumph:

:p

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 06:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042939)
Shorties. :thwak: We are height challenged. :harumph:

The proper term is spinner, I believe.:)

easycome_easygo 01-10-2009 06:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042946)
The proper term is spinner, I believe.:)

:doh:

Claremonster 01-10-2009 06:10 PM

Two midgets pick up a couple of hookers and take then to their Vegas hotel room for a little fun. After a few cocktails and some dancing, the lights go out, but the night doesn't go as planned. The first midget not only can't get a hard-on, but all night he has to listen to his buddy grunting "One, two, three, huh!" over and over. In the morning his pal asks him, "So how was it?"

"I can't believe how much it sucked," says the first midget. "I couldn't get hard all night. I'm so ashamed." The second midget answers, "You think that's bad? I
couldn't even get up on the bed!"

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 06:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042946)
The proper term is spinner, I believe.:)

I think the proper term is someone good at B__ due to we don't have to bendover or kneel.

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 06:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VYF (Post 1042948)
:doh:

Wha?

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042951)
I think the proper term is someone good at B__ due to we don't have to bendover or kneel.

:heart:drool

easycome_easygo 01-10-2009 06:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by shirtsleeve (Post 1042956)
Wha?



:heart:drool

I'm familiar with urban dictionary.

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 06:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042949)
Two midgets pick up a couple of hookers and take then to their Vegas hotel room for a little fun. After a few cocktails and some dancing, the lights go out, but the night doesn't go as planned. The first midget not only can't get a hard-on, but all night he has to listen to his buddy grunting "One, two, three, huh!" over and over. In the morning his pal asks him, "So how was it?"

"I can't believe how much it sucked," says the first midget. "I couldn't get hard all night. I'm so ashamed." The second midget answers, "You think that's bad? I
couldn't even get up on the bed!"


OWWW OWWW OWWWW the stomach crunches hurt from laughing so hard.

shirtsleeve 01-10-2009 06:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by VYF (Post 1042957)
I'm familiar with urban dictionary.

Riiigggt!wuv

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 06:19 PM

I was really good friends with Peter Dinkledge(Elf, The Station Agent,Threshold, now in 30 Rock) when growing up. In Jr. High you graduated by height. Peter was 1st and I was second. He looked at me and said, "See I knew You and I'd always be at the head of our class."

Costanza 01-10-2009 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042965)
I was really good friends with Peter Dinkledge(Elf, The Station Agent,Threshold, now in 30 Rock) when growing up. In Jr. High you graduated by height. Peter was 1st and I was second. He looked at me and said, "See I knew You and I'd always be at the head of our class."

ROFL Awesome

Claremonster 01-10-2009 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042965)
I was really good friends with Peter Dinkledge(Elf, The Station Agent,Threshold, now in 30 Rock) when growing up. In Jr. High you graduated by height. Peter was 1st and I was second. He looked at me and said, "See I knew You and I'd always be at the head of our class."

Awesome. Di you pat him on the top of the head, and say, "You're so cute when you make clever witticisms?"

Claremonster 01-10-2009 06:21 PM

And, just as an aside, is it me, or is the surname DickLedge kinda... ummm... funny, for an elf?

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042970)
Awesome. Di you pat him on the top of the head, and say, "You're so cute when you make clever witticisms?"

You crazy, he'd beat me up...

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 06:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042971)
And, just as an aside, is it me, or is the surname DickLedge kinda... ummm... funny, for an elf?



:thwak: d i N kledge.

Claremonster 01-10-2009 06:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LurkingWife (Post 1042976)
:thwak: d i N kledge.

Dick. Dink. Same thing. :coffee:

LurkingWife 01-10-2009 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Claremonster (Post 1042978)
Dick. Dink. Same thing. :coffee:


perv. :harumph:


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