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mikiemo83 08-24-2010 03:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by foley11 (Post 1550254)
Holy chit, thats deep. I think I felt it move.

simply put...make her moan and you will not groan

PatsFanLisa 08-24-2010 03:19 PM

Must have had Chinese food for lunch...those fortune cookies can be pretty prophetic.

easycome_easygo 08-24-2010 03:24 PM

More random thoughts...

Jealousy is a stinky cologne and you sure do wear it well.

tehrick67 08-24-2010 03:25 PM

:coffee:

mikiemo83 08-24-2010 03:27 PM

speaking of fortune cookies here is the furtune 55

55 bad fortunes

1. You will never know the magic word.
2. The sun rises in the East and beats your ass.
3. Ninety-five percent of the things you worry about will never happen. The other five percent will kill you.
4. If a pigeon poops on you, do not blame the pigeon, blame the poop.
5. You will break it; you will buy it.
6. Your assumptions are wrong.
7. Your winning smile will get you nowhere.
8. You are sitting on gum.
9. The lesser of two evils is still evil.
10. Ancient Chinese secret: You're screwed.
11. I know I am, but what am I? —Descartes, on the playground
12. Be decisive. Maybe. If you want to.
13. You've got something in your teeth.
14. If a man slaps you in the face, turn the other cheek and shoot him.
15. O.J. knows you did it.
16. You have many unique talents, none of which are marketable.
17. Next time, borrow a life.
18. The Tooth Fairy will step on your face.
19. Have you put on weight?
20. Two words: Nose job.
21. She was faking.
22. Embrace mediocrity. It suits you.
23. Beware of 10-year-olds with pennies on skyscraper roofs.
24. One man's life is another man's punchline.
25. You've always been a little different, haven't you? Put your clothes back on.
26. Nice booger.
27. 2,390,670,980 fortunes=one tree. Please recycle.
28. Cash value: 1/20th of a cent. Spiritual value: Yang.
29. Who dressed you?
30. Live and don't learn.
31. Sorry, this is a BYOF cookie.
32. You gonna eat that?
33. Your Indian spirit name is Ralphputian.
34. Your partner in life will be bad-tempered but serve a mean dish of chili.
35. A short man will tell you a tall tale.
36. You will be injured in a disco inferno.
37. You will have bad sex and bad pizza, in that order.
38. Your name will appear in the newspaper in a matter involving the American justice system, pudding and naked abandon.
39. You will take a long journey and forget to turn off the stove.
40. While you are giving an important speech, someone in the audience will ask, "Are you imagining us in our underwear?"
41. [Fortune Delivered by ESP]
42. You will sink and rust.
43. Social Security will run out the day you retire.
44. You will throw up on a train.
45. Kato Kaelin will rent your room.
46. You will have one of those days for a year.
47. You will be halved by a bad magician.
48. Your grandmother will see you on "Cops."
49. You will swing your arm and hit a lawyer.
50. Everything about you is getting smaller.
51. You have a spider in your ear.
52. Teenagers will begin using your first name as slang for "gross."
53. Your guardian angel got laid off.
54. Your pets have never liked you.
55. People are just being nice.

tehrick67 08-24-2010 03:29 PM

my favorite is still: man who goes to bed with itchy bum, wakes up with smelly finger...

easycome_easygo 08-24-2010 03:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tehrick67 (Post 1550283)
my favorite is still: man who goes to bed with itchy bum, wakes up with smelly finger...

Just hope he doesn't bite his nails as well.

Fully Tilted 08-24-2010 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tommysgirl (Post 1550067)



Dear God, this makes me sick to say, but I like a good SF87 joke. My son could be in Pitt for 3 days and still get more tail than he has in 21 years.ROFL

Oh. Snap!


She ain't kidding either. Kid's good with humans who own vaginas.

tehrick67 08-24-2010 03:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fully Tilted (Post 1550286)
Oh. Snap!


She ain't kidding either. Kid's good with humans who own vaginas.

For some reason this reminded me of this old Polish guy I worked with...every time a good lookng woman was around, he would rub his hands together and say in a broken accent "Um, vagina" with this very happy look on his face...it was a little creepy:blink:

foley11 08-24-2010 03:37 PM

Thinking of taking up smoking........:coffee:

tehrick67 08-24-2010 03:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by foley11 (Post 1550289)
Thinking of taking up smoking........:coffee:

I just started smoking crack:coffee:

mikiemo83 08-24-2010 03:38 PM

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mikiemo83 08-24-2010 03:38 PM

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mikiemo83 08-24-2010 03:39 PM

<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/HGLxJRq-jIY?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/HGLxJRq-jIY?fs=1&amp;hl=en_US" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>

mikiemo83 08-24-2010 03:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tehrick67 (Post 1550288)
For some reason this reminded me of this old Polish guy I worked with...every time a good lookng woman was around, he would rub his hands together and say in a broken accent "Um, vagina" with this very happy look on his face...it was a little creepy:blink:

we work together


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