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Dwight Schrute
09-02-2008, 09:20 AM
I got this from a friend. Thought it was comical. Your thoughts?

Scenario 1

Scenario: Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.
1957: Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack’s shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2007: School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

Scenario 2

Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1957: Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2007: Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.

Scenario 3

Scenario: Jeffrey won’t be still in class, disrupts other students.
1957: Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2007: Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.

Scenario 4

Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbor’s car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1957: Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2007: Billy’s dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy’s sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy’s mom has affair with psychologist.

Scenario 5

Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1957: Mark shares aspirin with Principal out on the smoking dock.
2007: Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario 6

Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.
1957: Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
2007: Pedro’s cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro’s English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

Scenario 7

Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.
1957: Ants die.
2007: BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny’s Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario 8

Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1957: In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2007: Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy. Johnny’s parents sue the school for negligence and the teacher for emotional trauma and win both cases. Mary, jobless and indebted, commits suicide by jumping off of a tall building. When she lands, she hits a car and also damages a potted pot. The car’s owner and the plant’s owner sue Mary’s estate for destruction of property. They both win.

RoadGrader
09-02-2008, 09:32 AM
Scenario 9

Scenario: Little RG dreams he can see all kinds of bewbies anytime he wants

1957: Little RG keeps staring at his black& white TV extremely disappointed that there are no nekkid bewbies

2007: Old RG fires up his trusty 'puter and 19" widescreen LCD monitor and has more bewbies to look at in under 10 seconds, all in full color and w/ sound if need be, than he can shake a stick at

Dwight Schrute
09-02-2008, 09:35 AM
Scenario 9

Scenario: Little RG dreams he can see all kinds of bewbies anytime he wants

1957: Little RG keeps staring at his black& white TV extremely disappointed that there are no nekkid bewbies

2007: Old RG fires up his trusty 'puter and 19" widescreen LCD monitor and has more bewbies to look at in under 10 seconds, all in full color and w/ sound if need be, than he can shake a stick at

Nice add!

I guess things aren't ALL bad when you put it that way!

Hawg73
09-02-2008, 09:51 AM
Some funny stuff there.

Goes with my general theory that I feel sorry for kids growing up these days in a world that wants to put them all in a sterile, injury and danger-proof bubble, when all it really accomplishes is to protect the adults from blame and guilt in the unlikely event something terrible actually happens.

Reminds me of a story a friend of mine likes to tell. He was a long-time altar boy for one of the well-known pervert priests in Mass who ended up getting busted, but the guy never touched him.

"What was wrong with me?" he mock laments "So what if I was a little overweight, I had feelings too. Now I suffer with deep-seated rejection issues."

It's sick but funny.

Dwight Schrute
09-02-2008, 09:53 AM
Some funny stuff there.

Goes with my general theory that I feel sorry for kids growing up these days in a world that wants to put them all in a sterile, injury and danger-proof bubble, when all it really accomplishes is to protect the adults from blame and guilt in the unlikely event something terrible actually happens.

Reminds me of a story a friend of mine likes to tell. He was a long-time altar boy for one of the well-known pervert priests in Mass who ended up getting busted, but the guy never touched him.

"What was wrong with me?" he mock laments "So what if I was a little overweight, I had feelings too. Now I suffer with deep-seated rejection issues."

It's sick but funny.


ROFLROFLROFL

He must be an ugly prick! Or smelly! Or something, if a priest wouldn't even bang him!

Claremonster
09-02-2008, 09:57 AM
Some funny stuff there.

Goes with my general theory that I feel sorry for kids growing up these days in a world that wants to put them all in a sterile, injury and danger-proof bubble, when all it really accomplishes is to protect the adults from blame and guilt in the unlikely event something terrible actually happens.

Reminds me of a story a friend of mine likes to tell. He was a long-time altar boy for one of the well-known pervert priests in Mass who ended up getting busted, but the guy never touched him.

"What was wrong with me?" he mock laments "So what if I was a little overweight, I had feelings too. Now I suffer with deep-seated rejection issues."

It's sick but funny.


:shake: yet ROFL


Seriously, though, reminds me of the story about a guy who went to go to confession, but there was a really long line and he was in a hurry, so he grabbed an altar boy and said, "I dont' have time to wait. What does Father Murphy give for a blowjob?" and the altar boy replied, "A snicker's bar..."

:coffee:

grog
09-02-2008, 10:00 AM
Scenario 8

Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1957: In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2007: Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy. Johnny’s parents sue the school for negligence and the teacher for emotional trauma and win both cases. Mary, jobless and indebted, commits suicide by jumping off of a tall building. When she lands, she hits a car and also damages a potted pot. The car’s owner and the plant’s owner sue Mary’s estate for destruction of property. They both win.


A 2nd grade teacher at my kids school was asked to stop giving hugs to the kids every morning when they come to class. She has done this for 35+ years and greeted my kids that way too. The kids all loved her. Anyway, when she was told this she quit right on the spot. She was going to retire next year anyway. Now the school is scrambling to find a teacher. Talk about dumb.

HarpoonIPA
09-02-2008, 10:03 AM
AWESOME stuff Dwight +1:thumb:

Dwight Schrute
09-02-2008, 10:35 AM
I think Hawg sums it up pretty good. In an effort to protect and sterilize everything we are inadvertently creating far worse effects later down the road.

Just let 'em live!

SteelerFan87
09-02-2008, 02:00 PM
Some of the 1957 scenarios are kind of dumb too. I mean, sharing asprin at school? Yeah, that's a good idea. And I don't think we should encourage kids to mess around with explosives, either...

patsfanroach
09-02-2008, 02:07 PM
Nice thread Dwight....as a pretty liberal school teacher I am even fed up with all of the crap that we have to do and can not do anymore...just look at the damn toys..plastic Tonka trucks? I mena we had lawn jart for chis sakes! and yes these situations may be a little far fetched, but they are not necessarily false either...it is frustrating to deal with drugged up kids ( I mean the ones on prescrption drugs)....

Dwight Schrute
09-02-2008, 02:08 PM
Nice thread Dwight....as a pretty liberal school teacher I am even fed up with all of the crap that we have to do and can not do anymore...just look at the damn toys..plastic Tonka trucks? I mena we had lawn jart for chis sakes! and yes these situations may be a little far fetched, but they are not necessarily false either...it is frustrating to deal with drugged up kids ( I mean the ones on prescrption drugs)....

You're at the forefront in the battle with what is wrong with America and I feel for ya!

Hawg73
09-02-2008, 03:03 PM
...it is frustrating to deal with drugged up kids ( I mean the ones on prescrption drugs)....

According to some friends of mine (both regular and special ed. teachers and admins.) one of the biggest problems is that today's parents can't handle having a kid that doesn't excel academically, so if little kaitlin or jason starts piling up enough D's they feel compelled to get him or her tagged with "ADD" or the like so they can feel that it isn't their fault. Then the prescriptions, private tutors, open book tests, etc. etc. The enabling begins.

The kid gets treated differently than their peers in an attempt to make the parents feel better and they get their first, but certainly not their last, special treatment so nobody's feelings get hurt. The "B" or "C" they end up earning is in all actuality a real world "D" or worse.

Problem is, someday the gravy train stops and a kid has to make their own way in the world. Will they be prepared to make the best of things when the system doesn't bend over backwards for them or their parents?

NOTE: Some kids have real problems and I'm not dumping on those with legit issues, but people on the inside of the education business have real concerns that things are spinning out of control and it's becoming a racket. They know better than I.

Dwight Schrute
09-02-2008, 03:43 PM
According to some friends of mine (both regular and special ed. teachers and admins.) one of the biggest problems is that today's parents can't handle having a kid that doesn't excel academically, so if little kaitlin or jason starts piling up enough D's they feel compelled to get him or her tagged with "ADD" or the like so they can feel that it isn't their fault. Then the prescriptions, private tutors, open book tests, etc. etc. The enabling begins.

The kid gets treated differently than their peers in an attempt to make the parents feel better and they get their first, but certainly not their last, special treatment so nobody's feelings get hurt. The "B" or "C" they end up earning is in all actuality a real world "D" or worse.

Problem is, someday the gravy train stops and a kid has to make their own way in the world. Will they be prepared to make the best of things when the system doesn't bend over backwards for them or their parents?

NOTE: Some kids have real problems and I'm not dumping on those with legit issues, but people on the inside of the education business have real concerns that things are spinning out of control and it's becoming a racket. They know better than I.

In the end the gravy train never stops Hawg. They'll end up on public assistance if they can't handle it themselves and spend their days fishing and at the library surfing while you and I pay for their free ride.

BY1401
09-02-2008, 04:11 PM
So in conclusion, I blame the Baby Boomers for this damn mess.

patsload
09-02-2008, 04:14 PM
I think my daughters 4th grade teacher tried to pull that on us "she has ADD you should look into blah blah" so we talked to her pediatrician who laughed her ass off then we had a sit down with the principal and told him that his teachers need to do what they are trained to do and not play amateur pyschologist

easycome_easygo
09-02-2008, 04:19 PM
I got this from a friend. Thought it was comical. Your thoughts?

Scenario 1

Scenario: Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.
1957: Vice Principal comes over, looks at Jack’s shotgun, goes to his car and gets his shotgun to show Jack.
2007: School goes into lock down, FBI called, Jack hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors called in for traumatized students and teachers.

Scenario 2

Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1957: Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2007: Police called, SWAT team arrives, arrests Johnny and Mark. Charge them with assault, both expelled even though Johnny started it.

Scenario 3

Scenario: Jeffrey won’t be still in class, disrupts other students.
1957: Jeffrey sent to office and given a good paddling by the Principal. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2007: Jeffrey given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra money from state because Jeffrey has a disability.

Scenario 4

Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbor’s car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1957: Billy is more careful next time, grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2007: Billy’s dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy’s sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy’s mom has affair with psychologist.

Scenario 5

Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some aspirin to school.
1957: Mark shares aspirin with Principal out on the smoking dock.
2007: Police called, Mark expelled from school for drug violations. Car searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario 6

Scenario: Pedro fails high school English.
1957: Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
2007: Pedro’s cause is taken up by state. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that teaching English as a requirement for graduation is racist. ACLU files class action lawsuit against state school system and Pedro’s English teacher. English banned from core curriculum. Pedro given diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

Scenario 7

Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover firecrackers from 4th of July, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle, blows up a red ant bed.
1957: Ants die.
2007: BATF, Homeland Security, FBI called. Johnny charged with domestic terrorism, FBI investigates parents, siblings removed from home, computers confiscated, Johnny’s Dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario 8

Scenario: Johnny falls while running during recess and scrapes his knee. He is found crying by his teacher, Mary. Mary hugs him to comfort him.
1957: In a short time, Johnny feels better and goes on playing.
2007: Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces 3 years in State Prison. Johnny undergoes 5 years of therapy. Johnny’s parents sue the school for negligence and the teacher for emotional trauma and win both cases. Mary, jobless and indebted, commits suicide by jumping off of a tall building. When she lands, she hits a car and also damages a potted pot. The car’s owner and the plant’s owner sue Mary’s estate for destruction of property. They both win.

ROFL Nice! Thanks for sharing Dwight! :kisss:

Dwight Schrute
09-02-2008, 04:24 PM
ROFL Nice! Thanks for sharing Dwight! :kisss:

Anytime toots!

Ras
09-02-2008, 04:37 PM
Some funny stuff there.

Goes with my general theory that I feel sorry for kids growing up these days in a world that wants to put them all in a sterile, injury and danger-proof bubble, when all it really accomplishes is to protect the adults from blame and guilt in the unlikely event something terrible actually happens.

Reminds me of a story a friend of mine likes to tell. He was a long-time altar boy for one of the well-known pervert priests in Mass who ended up getting busted, but the guy never touched him.

"What was wrong with me?" he mock laments "So what if I was a little overweight, I had feelings too. Now I suffer with deep-seated rejection issues."

It's sick but funny.


Reminds me a joke I heard when I saw Carlos Mencia at the CC Melody Tent;

This family was visiting the Grand Canyon when this eagle swoops down and grabs the pet dog and flies away with him. The father in a desperate attempt to save the family dog, lunges at the bird but misses the bird and falls into the canyon.

The wife, who sees her husband falling into the canyon, also tries leaps in attempt to save him and she too, falls into the canyon. Their daughter who was trying to hold onto the mother, get hers hand caught in the mother's belt and is also dragged into the canyon.

The son, who was 8 years old, is left alone at the top of the canyon ridge and in complete shock as to what just happened. He is crying when this park ranger comes along. The park ranger asks what happens and the little explains that his parents and sister fell over the edge and into the canyon.

The park ranger unzips his fly and says; "I guess today is not your day."

Claremonster
09-02-2008, 04:39 PM
Reminds me a joke I heard when I saw Carlos Mencia at the CC Melody Tent;

This family was visiting the Grand Canyon when this eagle swoops down and grabs the pet dog and flies away with him. The father in a desperate attempt to save the family dog, lunges at the bird but misses the bird and falls into the canyon.

The wife, who sees her husband falling into the canyon, also tries leaps in attempt to save him and she too, falls into the canyon. Their daughter who was trying to hold onto the mother, get hers hand caught in the mother's belt and is also dragged into the canyon.

The son, who was 8 years old, is left alone at the top of the canyon ridge and in complete shock as to what just happened. He is crying when this park ranger comes along. The park ranger asks what happens and the little explains that his parents and sister fell over the edge and into the canyon.

The park ranger unzips his fly and says; "I guess today is not your day."

The trooper didn't have to walk back alone in the dark did he? eeek

BY1401
09-02-2008, 04:41 PM
The trooper didn't have to walk back alone in the dark did he? eeek

ROFL

Steve1
09-02-2008, 04:44 PM
Problem is, someday the gravy train stops and a kid has to make their own way in the world. Will they be prepared to make the best of things when the system doesn't bend over backwards for them or their parents?

NOTE: Some kids have real problems and I'm not dumping on those with legit issues, but people on the inside of the education business have real concerns that things are spinning out of control and it's becoming a racket. They know better than I.

I'm a teacher, and I see this happening. Plus, not only will some kids have to make their way into the world, and not be properly prepared, ....the world has to keep helping and paying for some kids