View Full Version : Be here or be talked about -- Hawg73's life in pictures.
This is the thread where I make good on a promise (or a threat....) He is going to die when he reads the title. The topic is Hawg73. Discuss.
pookie
02-27-2003, 04:56 PM
I remember when Hawg73 was young....... little Hawg13. He was just a young'n over there playing on patriots.com. I'll try to dig up a picture of the little Hawg (pun intended).
OOOOOOOHHHHHH!!!... :)
Did you read what I posted to Pookie earlier?! It was just this--that we should start a thread that is about Hawg, while he is away and see how mortified he is, upon his return... Hee-hee! :)
Let's see if I can recall anything EMBARRASSING that I could share about ol' Hawg... Hmmm... Wow! My brain is on information OVER-LOAD!! And here I have always vowed to only use my frightingly accurate memory powers for good and never evil... Hmmm... This is quite the conundrum... I'll have to give this some serious thought...
dropKickMurphy
02-27-2003, 05:09 PM
Originally posted by Peg
Let's see if I can recall anything EMBARRASSING that I could share about ol' Hawg... .
Oh, Ive got lots of embarassin' tidbits on the Hawg. Problem is, he's got just as many on me. I'm chompin' at the bit here, but I need to hold off until I figure out the appropiate level of restraint.
Count your blessings, Hawg....the principal of MATH (Mutual Assured Total Humiliation) will keep my baser instincts in check.
dKM--
I figured that you'd have some doozies and at least you have M.A.T.H. to keep you in check... But what constraints are there to keep ME in line?! Hee-hee! :)
Originally posted by Peg
Did you read what I posted to Pookie earlier?! It was just this--that we should start a thread that is about Hawg, while he is away and see how mortified he is, upon his return... Hee-hee! :)
Peg,
Great minds must think alike. I saw your post and it was deja vu all over again. Either that or I am losing my mind...but I would rather think that it is Providence. The city not the higher power.... All signs just point to either losing my mind or Providence. Some think they are one in the same.
I am counting on the Planet faithful to dig up some dirt -- or at least MAKE up some.
IGIG and dropKick will need to step up and prove that they are in fact trustworthy members of the Planet -- willing to turn in a relative to save their own skin at a moments notice. This is what we mean by 'loyalty'.
After years of fishing and having nothing to show for it Hawg finally lands one.
Originally posted by dropKickMurphy
Count your blessings, Hawg....the principal of MATH (Mutual Assured Total Humiliation) will keep my baser instincts in check.
ROFL
Detente. The Cold War. They say that now but they haven't seen the carrot yet. Can they be bought? Will they launch a pre-emptive strike? Stay tuned. "Relatives Who Rat You Out." On the next Jerry Springer.
pookie
02-27-2003, 10:26 PM
Here we see a young Hawg getting pumped up before his next Pinewood Derby Classic. Note the futuristic X2000 jersey, the Commodore 64 (which Hawg still uses) and a handsome young IGIG to the right. Hawg would go on to lose his first Pinewood Derby ever on this evening. He then turned in his tight corduroys, began writing sci-fi short story's, playing Missile Command and became the #1 William Shatner fan.
Only certain folks will understand what a special, kick ass game missle command really was.
Here is Hawg today, proudly showing off his Beefcake award.
Hey Peg,
As proof that I am not delusional, this was my post to Hawg in the girlie thread.... I knew I had written it I just couldn't find it.
Great minds think alike :)...but I am happy to concede that this was your idea. I can only imagine that Hawg will seek some comeuppance...er, to reward someone upon his return. The genesis for this thread, the driving force behind this touching tribute was PEG. Let there be no mistake about it, Pookie and I are merely pawns. Yes Hawg, it is Peg that you should thank. Without her leadership this would have never been possible.
Okie-Dokey, NR!!! :)
I seeeeeeee how this is gonna work now...
Well, if I am going to take the brunt for this, then it sure does help me with that moral dilemma of using my powers for EVIL and NOT good, now doesn't it?! I mean, if I'm gonna take the fall for this, then I am going to have some fun while doing so... :)
Now, WHAT would be an INCREDIBLY embarrassing thing to post about our good buddy Hawg?!... Something DOES come to mind, but I am afraid that it just might be a little over the top... Hee-hee! :)
I can't believe that IG_IG hasn't chimed in on this thread... Must be M.A.T.H. keeping him in check... So what say ye, IG_IG?!... :)p.s.--OOHH!! I just thought of yet another REALLY embarrassing thing... But, Heaven help me--He might not ever acknowledge my existence again, if I write about THAT!!... Oh, what to do, what to do?!...
Lil Hawg's first baby photo, but not his first haircut.
pookie
02-28-2003, 02:21 PM
Originally posted by NoRespect
Lil Hawg's first baby photo, but not his first haircut.
Staying with the chronology.......... Hawg at age 9. Isn't he just a cutie pie???!!
Pookie--
That looks like the "Man-boy" from the "Man Show." Ever watch that show?! Jimy Kimmel is one of the hosts. It is really raunchy & I think that it is a hoot!... :)
Anyhow--I may have come up with a solution to my quandary here... What if I post some embarrassing stuff about Hawg, so everyone can read it, and then DELETE it before he gets back... What do ya think?!... :)
pookie
02-28-2003, 02:54 PM
Originally posted by Peg
Pookie--
That looks like the "Man-boy" from the "Man Show." Ever watch that show?! Jimy Kimmel is one of the hosts. It is really raunchy & I think that it is a hoot!... :)
Anyhow--I may have come up with a solution to my quandary here... What if I post some embarrassing stuff about Hawg, so everyone can read it, and then DELETE it before he gets back... What do ya think?!... :)
I don't think at all about that. I'm just the village idiot. I know nothing, see nothing.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
remember nothing......
Originally posted by Peg
Anyhow--I may have come up with a solution to my quandary here... What if I post some embarrassing stuff about Hawg, so everyone can read it, and then DELETE it before he gets back... What do ya think?!... :)
Peg,
I wouldn't do that because it will be hard to cover up things like the quote above.... ;) ;)
Great picture of Hawg Pook. I had heard he was chubby as a child but I didn't realize how chubby. :D
I'm just glad that the idea for this thread was so ENTIRELY your own Peg because I think some of the things that will be posted here in the future could be awkward. Thanks for taking all the heat on this -- we owe you one.
pookie
02-28-2003, 04:01 PM
Originally posted by NoRespect
Peg,
I wouldn't do that because it will be hard to cover up things like the quote above.... ;) ;)
Great picture of Hawg Pook. I had heard he was chubby as a child but I didn't realize how chubby. :D
I'm just glad that the idea for this thread was so ENTIRELY your own Peg because I think some of the things that will be posted here in the future could be awkward. Thanks for taking all the heat on this -- we owe you one.
:LOL: :LOL: ROFL ROFL :clap: :clap:
Yes Peg... This was a great idea you came up with! We love you for it.
...you owe me one!... :)
Actually--I was thinking that we leave that last reply of mine and then make Hawg JUST THINK that we posted some embarrassing stuff about him and then deleted it... You know--play head games with him! (But, then we'd have to delete THIS post, wouldn't we?!) Or WOULD we?! Again--keep him guessing... Did we or didn't we post some stuff about him? Heh-heh... Either way--I figure my ass is grass when he is back... I JUST KNOW IT!! :)
So--you not only OWE me, NR---you owe me BIG time!... :)
Originally posted by Peg
Actually--I was thinking that we leave that last reply of mine and then make Hawg JUST THINK that we posted some embarrassing stuff about him and then deleted it... You know--play head games with him! (But, then we'd have to delete THIS post, wouldn't we?!) Or WOULD we?! Again--keep him guessing... Did we or didn't we post some stuff about him? Heh-heh... Either way--I figure my ass is grass when he is back... I JUST KNOW IT!! :)
:archive: :LOL: More incriminating words.
Great idea Pe
that stuff you po ted about him
did you real y mean it?
We c n delet this lat r and it
Will keep him guess ng
ab ut whether or n t
we deleted part of the po s or not
Ya mean that we can't delete my ENTIRE post?! Or are you just jerking my chain, NR?!...
I am thinking of some non-verbal communication right now, NR... Are you sensing it?! LOL! :)
Perhaps I should find an emoticon to convey this feeling... :)
Originally posted by Peg
Ya mean that we can't delete my ENTIRE post?! Or are you just jerking my chain, NR?!...
I am thinking of some non-verbal communication right now, NR... Are you sensing it?! LOL! :)
Perhaps I should find an emoticon to convey this feeling... :)
If you are asking if I am "feeling" you, in a non-verbal way, the answer is yes. And yes I am yanking your chain, although I thought only men had yankable chains (are you a hermaphrodite?) :)
If you delete the post you will lose everything above it. However, If I were to delete this "hypothetical" post it can be made to disappear as if it NEVER existed. Except the part where you were telling us about his sexual fantasies -- that part is permanent. It is kind of a built in safety mechanism designed to deflect responsibility. No way around it.
You are really trying to dig me in deep, aren't you?! You, my friend, are a true SCOUNDREL!... :)
Are you feeling me now?!?!?!...
Originally posted by Peg
You are really trying to dig me in deep, aren't you?! You, my friend, are a true SCOUNDREL!... :)
Are you feeling me now?!?!?!...
Dirty Dog at your service ma'am.
I feel the glare of a million smilies.
Hawg and friend living long at Science Camp.
Hawg researching the character of Admiral Jeelizar.
Gone too far to stop now.
Yearbook photo, circa 1979.
Converting to Islam in '93 because he felt that the Catholic Church's best fighting years were behind them, Hawg traveled the Middle and Lower East looking for enlightenment, things to blow up and a razor. His Muslim name is Sheik Khalid Mohammed Randel El 73. He was later drafted in the 1995 Expansion Draft by the Carolina Panthers who confused him with someone else.
Unable to make a go of it in the NFL as a WR, he bounced around aimlessly for a time alternately holding a variety of disparate jobs such as a head coach, professional photographer and choreographer.
Hawg eventually turned his attention to the theatre where he appeared as the Purple Headed guy in Moulin Rouge.
Hawg soon found that the old adage about the difficulties of "being green" also held true for purple. Life as a brightly-colored man were limiting so he abandoned corporeal form and began anew as an animation. His true form was never revealed but it might have looked something like this:
Reappearing as a runway model in '97 he showed he could still turn heads.
...all good stuff! :)
Speaking of "being green", do you think that you could dig up a photo of ol' Hawg in his favorite, groovy GREEN bell-bottoms that he used to wear in the '70's?!?!... If you need any help, ask dKM, as I think that he had a somewhat matching pair... LOL! :)
Speaking of the '70's---I think that you must have the wrong high school graduation year... Unless Hawg was slow, (which he WASN'T!!--Hell, I'm in ENOUGH trouble here already!), he would have graduated in '74 and not '79...
Keep up the good work, man, as he probably returns tonight or tomorrow... The end is near... YIKES! :)
Turning to tennis his ground strokes quickly earned him a spot on the Women's circuit. He later admitted he did it just to post a smokingly-hot picture and annoy Alice.
Knowing that to do it again was just shameless self-promotion he did it again because that is what got him there.
Still through it all he felt that he was missing something. He looked everywhere for meaning.
That search goes on today. He was last spotted on a fairway in England. Will he ever stop running?
Originally posted by Peg
...do you think that you could dig up a photo of ol' Hawg in his favorite, groovy GREEN bell-bottoms that he used to wear in the '70's?!?!... If you need any help, ask dKM, as I think that he had a somewhat matching pair... LOL! :)
Speaking of the '70's---I think that you must have the wrong high school graduation year... Unless Hawg was slow, (which he WASN'T!!--Hell, I'm in ENOUGH trouble here already!), he would have graduated in '74 and not '79...
The end is near... YIKES! :)
Yeah it would be good to end with a clothed shot of him...the END is near alright. I'm just glad this was your idea. Why don't you go find those photos. I think I am in enough trouble already, although I am only an minor accomplice.
We ne d to shr d the evid nce soon so he doe n't find out.
Hawg73
03-02-2003, 12:51 PM
Whew....I don't even know where to begin, but it would appear that you all missed me (I think). I have been pictorialized as a fat kid (hilarious) a geek, a nose picker and many more and I can't possibly respond here to all of your clever barbs and wisecracks since my brain is still addled from sun and martinis. In time I will get to all of you. In due time.
Seriously, it was nice to come home and see this thread it made me feel.......special and I want you all to know that I had to fight the urge to go into the Internet cafe on the ship and spend ridiculous amounts of money to visit you all. I was barely successful.
In short the vacation was outstanding and I can face the next month tanned and relaxed. My favorite part of it was the role I played in helping to bring the Stars and Stripes 12 meter yacht to a narrow one foot victory over the True North I Canadian team. It was a thrilling expericence and I decided to include a photo of the event to share it with you all. See if you can guess which one I am.
Hmmm... That was a pretty tame response, Hawg... :)
Your brain MUST still be on vacation... Although, I definitely did detect a bit of a veiled threat to retaliate at some future juncture... Just keep in mind who ACTUALLY started this thread... (Sheesh, when I suggested that he jump off a bridge, HE didn't listen to THAT suggestion...) Sorry, NR--It's every poster for him/herself!! :)
I was thinking about taking a vacation next month, but after what happened to you while you were gone, I think not! BTW--We DID miss you & it must have taken Herculean strength to resist signing on at the Internet cafe, as we assume that you missed all of us, as well! :) Boy, it's a good thing that I learned how to delete posts, before you returned, though! Hee-hee! :)
Just for the record--What in the world do you have on your lil bro, that he never once chimed in on this thread?!?! It MUST be good! :) (or rather--VERY, VERY BAD!) LOL! :)
Welcome Home, Hawg! :)
We'll look forward to seeing the real pictures! :)
Originally posted by Hawg73
Whew....I don't even know where to begin, but it would appear that you all missed me (I think). I have been pictorialized as a fat kid (hilarious) a geek, a nose picker and many more and I can't possibly respond here to all of your clever barbs and wisecracks since my brain is still addled from sun and martinis. In time I will get to all of you. In due time.
Seriously, it was nice to come home and see this thread it made me feel.......special and I want you all to know that I had to fight the urge to go into the Internet cafe on the ship and spend ridiculous amounts of money to visit you all. I was barely successful.
In short the vacation was outstanding and I can face the next month tanned and relaxed. My favorite part of it was the role I played in helping to bring the Stars and Stripes 12 meter yacht to a narrow one foot victory over the True North I Canadian team. It was a thrilling expericence and I decided to include a photo of the event to share it with you all. See if you can guess which one I am.
Hawg,
Glad to see you had a good time. I am jealous. I only hope you aren't too hard on Peg for her indiscretions in your absence.... Good answer with the beefcake troll head. After I was done I thought about doing something like that but didn't have the energy. Remember, go easy on Peg, she did take considerable liberties with your personal information but she meant well. ;) Glad to have you back safe and sound from science camp.
Live long. :D
pookie
03-03-2003, 11:39 AM
Originally posted by NoRespect
Hawg,
Glad to see you had a good time. I am jealous. I only hope you aren't too hard on Peg for her indiscretions in your absence.... Good answer with the beefcake troll head. After I was done I thought about doing something like that but didn't have the energy. Remember, go easy on Peg, she did take considerable liberties with your personal information but she meant well. ;) Glad to have you back safe and sound from science camp.
Live long. :D
I think Peg's idea was great!
Thanks, thanks a lot, Pook!... :)
I was even nice enough to try and deflect blame only towards NR and not towards YOU, you little vermin!...
Sheesh, with "friends" like you, who needs...
Ahh--just remember what "pay-back" is, man! Heh-heh! :)
SamBam39
03-03-2003, 01:47 PM
Welcome back Hawg!!!
I want to go on record as saying I did not add to this glowing account of your life and times. (More because I forgot to than I didn't want to...but that is neither here nor there) Hope you had a great trip!!! :D
Hawg73
03-03-2003, 05:26 PM
Thank you Mr. Underscore. Nice to be back. As for the rest of you:
Peg -
1. You should bear in mind that payback is a bi-yotch. Yesterday I was all
laid-back and in post vacation mode and too mellow to pay close attention.
Today is a different story. I knew deep down inside that it was all your
doing and NR and Pookie have helped me to close the case.
2. your memory is starting to fade. I never owned green bellbottoms - they
were brown crushed velvet FYI.
DKM -
Fotunately MATH has successfully held you in check. Good thing for you cuz
- or I might have told them all about that time in Tiajuana with the
Catholic Priest, the disgruntled postal worker and the donkey.
NR -
1. that fishing photo couldn't possibly be me. I have never caught a fish
that good and am undoubtedly one of the world's worst at that pastime. I
carry a black cloud that causes both myself and everyone around me to get
shut out. I have even tested this power on party boats in which the ENTIRE
BOAT got a donut hole. Not sure why. That and I cause electronic cash
registers to malfunction with regularity. Other than that I'm fine.
2. What part about my sexual fantasies? Was it PEG that posted those?
D'oh!!!!!
3. The yearbook photo circa '79 - I actually graduated in '73 for the
record ( youngest in class) and that guy is not too unlike me at that time
- just add shoulder length hair with wings and slightly less Wayne
Newtonesque..
4. Did you see the photo of Sheik Khalid Mohammed Randel El 73 in the
papers this morning? Life on the run hasn't been agreeing with him. He now
looks exactly like Ron Jeremy.
5. How the H- E - double hockey sticks did you find out about the runway
modeling thing? Did Peg blab on me and then delete it? Pegggggg?
6. Thanks for all the trouble you went through to harass me per Peg's
instructions - I got a really good laugh out of it - hope you did as well.
Pookie -
1. I don't know where you found that photo of the "first date" kid but it
was pretty close to me at that age. I never got THAT fat though. I was
really more "husky" as they used to say. A great laugh with that one - I'm
saving it.
Originally posted by Hawg73
3. The yearbook photo circa '79 - I actually graduated in '73 for the
record ( youngest in class) and that guy is not too unlike me at that time
- just add shoulder length hair with wings and slightly less Wayne
Newtonesque..
4. Did you see the photo of Sheik Khalid Mohammed Randel El 73 in the
papers this morning? Life on the run hasn't been agreeing with him. He now
looks exactly like Ron Jeremy.
I couldn't help notice the eerie similarities between you and Wayne Newton but I didn't want to say anything. You've probably heard that a million times.
That photo of Randel El 73 had me beside myself. Ron Jeremy. ROFL Porn tryouts in Jalalabad. I hear they are going to be filming a gay adult feature at Leavenworth. He will be perfect for the lead. And they say that justice is dead.
Well, I must say that my first response was, "Gulp!"... I hate waiting for the other shoe to drop phenomenon... The wondering & worrying about "payback" can be much worse than the actual payback... And then I thought, "Hmmm, I can't imagine that Hawg could come up with something MORE embarrassing on me, than vice-versa... For one thing, that nearly 47 year old brain can't possibly compare to my more youthful memory banks, right?! But then, that is assuming that he doesn't resort to some sort of "poetic license" and simply make things up with that slightly twisted, creative mind of his... Having said that, I hope that if he comes up with something TRULY bizarre, that you would all believe me, if I denied it... Are we all on-board here?!... Hope so!
NOW... to keep you somewhat "in check", Hawg, I just want to mention a few key phrases...
1.) Your orchid growing phase...
2.) Road trips to Montreal/McGill U...
3.) What happens when you play the guitar in front of others...
4.) Electro-magnetic fields & auras...
6.) When you were a kid & were lured under the cabin, at the lake...
5.) Felix...
And you KNOW this is just the tip of the iceberg, right?!.. :)
Need I say more?! Heh-heh!! Me-thinks that I have a winning hand, here, so TREAD LIGHTLY, man!... :)
btw--I knew that the bell-bottoms were brown, crushed-velvet, but I was TRYING to make them seem a little MORE attractive, man! :)
So, what say ye?!... :)
(Translation = Bring it on, baby!) :)
p.s. glad to have you back! :)
dropKickMurphy
03-04-2003, 06:58 AM
Originally posted by Peg
....6.) When you were a kid & were lured under the cabin, at the lake...
Peg -
Wow, Hawg73 told you about that one!?!
It wasn't a lake, though, it was at the ocean...Green Harbor....where a favorite pasttime was to tie army men to popsicle sticks and stick them in the muddy bank of the marsh and watch the tide come up on them. Little plastic buggers never wanted to talk but they'd chatter like monkeys when that water got up to their chins.....and whose bright idea was it to try it with a live praying mantis....oh yeah, look how fast he's praying NOW....
And that's all I'm saying (MATH, you know)....even if you do tie me to a popsicle stick.
dropKickMurphy
03-04-2003, 07:10 AM
Originally posted by Peg
Well, I must say that my first response was, "Gulp!"... I hate waiting for the other shoe to drop phenomenon... The wondering & worrying about "payback" can be much worse than the actual payback... And then I thought, "Hmmm, I can't imagine that Hawg could come up with something MORE embarrassing on me, than vice-versa... For one thing, that nearly 47 year old brain can't possibly compare to my more youthful memory banks, right?! But then, that is assuming that he doesn't resort to some sort of "poetic license" and simply make things up with that slightly twisted, creative mind of his... Having said that, I hope that if he comes up with something TRULY bizarre, that you would all believe me, if I denied it... Are we all on-board here?!... Hope so!
Peg -
Between your threats and promises, you may be able to prevent Hawg from uncovering the skeletons in your closet. But then, you have to worry about how many beans he may have spilled to me and/or IG_IG. Maybe he told me nothing...maybe he told me everything. I ain't sayin'.....Face it , sweetheart, you're ass-deep in MATH just like the rest of us! :D
dropKickMurphy
03-04-2003, 07:34 AM
Originally posted by Hawg73
...but it
was pretty close to me at that age. I never got THAT fat though. I was
really more "husky" as they used to say....
Hawg -
I seem to remember a very young Hawg getting harassed on a Dorchester street by an older kid. "Hey, aren't you Chubby Checker? That's what I'm gonna call you, Chubby Checker, haw haw!".
The response was classic young Hawg:
"For your information Chubby Checker isn't even fat. And besides, Chubby Checker is a Negro, and I'm not!"
dropKickMurphy
....Little plastic buggers never wanted to talk but they'd chatter like monkeys when that water got up to their chins.....and whose bright idea was it to try it with a live praying mantis....oh yeah, look how fast he's praying NOW....
ROFL Thanks for the disturbing look inside the adolescent mind. Some things, like torturing plastic army soldiers so that they will reveal their secrets, are universally understood by all members of the male persuasion. What is scary is that even though I have no idea what you are talking about, I know exactly what you mean.
Between your threats and promises, you may be able to prevent Hawg from uncovering the skeletons in your closet. But then, you have to worry about how many beans he may have spilled to me and/or IG_IG. Maybe he told me nothing...maybe he told me everything. I ain't sayin'.....Face it , sweetheart, you're ass-deep in MATH just like the rest of us! :D
There are plenty of MATH and beans to go around. Maybe she talks more than she would like to admit, eh Clarice? :D
AHH, yes... As in the infamous words of Lector: "Tit for tat, Clarice. Tit for tat!" :)
How about a nice Chianti with those beans?!...
Better yet--how about comparing notes over a Sam Adams and a Miller Lite, at our Pats fan gathering on March 19th?... What say ye?!... :)
Our gathering would not be the same without you...
Respondez S'il Vous Plais. :)
RO, MFTFPF! :)
BizarroAnnihilus
11-22-2006, 12:16 PM
No reason, really. ;)
Moebius
11-22-2006, 01:38 PM
Let's Do The Time Warp Again!!!!
kirjtc2
11-22-2006, 02:11 PM
Is this "bump an old thread from 3 years ago" day?
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