You have to see this

[dropKickMurphy]

In honor of the return of It'sGood_It'sGood, I give you the following web site:
http://www.allthingsinc.com/mowattinc/Index.htm

I'm particularly interested in the services offered, such as "Carpet Soil Protectant" and "Fabric Wall Covering Shampooing".

Also, the photo of the 2 white guys in white shirts and ties is priceless. Say, isn't that Freddie Smerlas and Tony Eason?

[pookie]

Interesting site DKM, but I'm wondering what this has to do with IG_IG. There's got to be an inside joke here or something that you and Hawg were busting his chops about while your bus had crashed into the snow bank last weekend. Or....maybe IG_IG is a loyal employee of Stanley Steamer????!

Originally posted by pookie
Interesting site DKM, but I'm wondering what this has to do with IG_IG. There's got to be an inside joke here or something that you and Hawg were busting his chops about while your bus had crashed into the snow bank last weekend. Or....maybe IG_IG is a loyal employee of Stanley Steamer????!


ROFL


Pook,

It is in fact an inside joke. You would have to know IGIG from when he was the "member" formerly known as Mowattspenis.

I will not go into all the details, but if you remember Zeke Mowatt was the All-World Tight End not only of Giants fame but also of our beloved New England Patriots. He hauled in six catches over a workman-like ten games in a Patriots uniform but those impressive statistics are not what will endear him in the hearts and minds of the Patriot faithful until the end of regulation time. No what makes Zeke a hero of truly epic proportions is something altogether different .

Our very own Hawg73, brother of IGIG, had a theory that links Mowatt with having starting a chain of events that resulted in nothing less than a Lombardi trophy. Upon hearing the irrefutable conclusions of his brother with respect to Mowatt's place in history, IGIG changed his very NAME in tribute. (Somewhere a band is softly playing Will Smith's "Gettin' Jiggy Wit It")

I will leave the details to Hawg. One more time Hawg, if you will. A work of such magnitude belongs to the people.



(p.s. -- dKM: You guys are too funny. Glad to have you back contributing to the board. It is sad to see that Zeke, after all he did for the New England organization has been reduced to being the owner of a janitorial company. Sad. That could be Smerlas in that photo -- particularly if he doesn't start making more meaningful commentary.)

[Hawg73]

Wow. I had no idea Zeke was in the cleaning business.

Okay, NR - here you go. The bizarre and yet plausible theory that made Pats fans scratch their heads and sparked It's_Goods former nickname. It was written last year so that explains the dated references.



He didn't have much success on the field. He didn't catch many passes or throw many memorable blocks, but I believe that Tight End Zeke Mowatt was the most important player in Patriot's history. the Pat's acquired the former NY Giant as a free agent at the beginning of the 1990 season. In September of that year, for those who may have missed it, an event happened which changed the course of Patriot's history.

As the story goes, Lisa Olson, a reporter for the Boston herald was in the locker room trying to conduct an interview. Her version of the story was that she was sexually and verbally harassed by several members of the team. Their version was that she was notorious for checking out the player's "equipment" and that their complaints about this to team management were ignored. Both sides pretty much agree that Zeke Mowatt took matters into his own hands by shaking Mr. Happy at her like he was wiggling a Slinky.

This incident precipitated a major controversy both locally and nationally, as Olson became a symbol for sexual harassment. The Patriot's owner at that time was the late Victor Kiam, the CEO of Remington Razors, and a TV pitchman who was famous for his tagline:

"I liked the razors so much I bought the Company."

Comedian Dennis Miller later paraphrased Kiam by saying:

"He liked Zeke Mowatt's penis so much, he bought the team."

Kiam went on to show he was not overly bright when he was quoted as calling Olson "a classic bitch" and then fanned the flames by telling a joke at a luncheon some months later,

Q: What does Lisa Olson have in common with Saddam Hussein? A: They have both seen a Patriot missle at close range.

This joke did not go over big with the women of America and they proved it by organizing a boycott of Remington products. The company's stock price started sliding rapidly and under financial duress Kiam was forced to sell the team.

The new owner was James Orthwein, a St. Louis businessman who despite his repeated denials, was determined to move the Pats to that city. Fortunately for us, the NFL blocked him from doing so. Orthwein might have been a liar, but he wasn't stupid and proved it by giving control of the team to Bill Parcells. The team which was having major problems on and off the field began to turn things around and gained instant credibility with the Tuna, their No. 1 draft choice Drew Bledsoe (whom they acquired because they lost 14 games during the Olson fiasco), and his secret genius Defensive Coordinator Bill Belichick. Things were definitely looking up in Foxboro.

Orthwein became frustrated with the NFL's prevention of his planned move and sold the team to Bob Kraft, and I don't have to tell anybody that he is probably the only guy in the country willing to:

A: keep the team here, and
B: actually build a state-of-the-art stadium with his own money.

Of course, he and the Tuna eventually had a falling out and after a few years with the Pete the Poodle Carroll regime, he defied the "experts" and brought Belichick back as head coach.

So now we find ourselves on top of the football world with stable ownership, a brand spanking new stadium, a certified football genius as a head coach and most importantly - a Lombardi trophy with the New England Patriot's name on it.

It is said that World War I was sparked by a single bullet. Now I don't have a crystal ball, and there is no accurate way to determine the effect of past events on the present. It's impossible to know what would have happened had Mowatt not seen fit to twirl his trouser snake around on that fateful day, but my guess is that none of the above would have happened and we might not even HAVE a pro football team here to talk about.

So it is in gratitude to the fact that we are now Champions of the World that I pay a little tribute to the series of improbable events which allowed the Kiam-Mowatt-Olson-Orthwein-Parcells-Kraft-Belichick connection to somehow come together, and because of the waggle heard 'round the world, I nominate Zeke Mowatt as the New England Patriot's All-Time MVP. Most Valuable Penis.

[pookie]

Originally posted by Hawg73
I nominate Zeke Mowatt as the New England Patriot's All-Time MVP. Most Valuable Penis.

I second that!! Great story Hawg.

[bideau]

Originally posted by Hawg73
The new owner was James Orthwein, a St. Louis businessman who despite his repeated denials, was determined to move the Pats to that city. Fortunately for us, the NFL blocked him from doing so. Orthwein might have been a liar, but he wasn't stupid and proved it by giving control of the team to Bill Parcells. The team which was having major problems on and off the field began to turn things around and gained instant credibility with the Tuna, their No. 1 draft choice Drew Bledsoe (whom they acquired because they lost 14 games during the Olson fiasco), and his secret genius Defensive Coordinator Bill Belichick. Things were definitely looking up in Foxboro.

A couple a minor adjustments to this part of the story. The Pats went 1-15 during the '90 season. Ironically, their only win was in week 2 against the Colts and the Olsen incident occurred after this game. They then lost 14 straight. Rod Rust was fired after the season. Kiam brought in Sam Jankovich from UMiami to take over the team and try to straighten out the mess. Jankovich hired the almost forgettable Dick MacPherson from Syracuse.

The Pats recovered to go 6-10 in '91, I believe it was right around this time that Kiam was forced to sell the team. Local Reebok owner Paul Firestone wanted to buy both the team and stadium. The stadium went up for bid in a court ordered bankruptcy auction. Firestone low bid, figuring no one would want the stadium. That's when Kraft surprised everyone by outbidding him. With no stadium, Firestone backed out and Kiam was forced to sell to Orthwein.

In '92, the Pats went 2-14. The season was highlighted by Macpherson being hospitalized for several weeks with heart problems (Trivia: Who took over as intermin coach?). Following the season, Orthwein fired Jankovich and MacPerson, and hired Parcells, who in turn drafted Bledsoe. BTW, Belichick was coaching Cleveland at the time. He didn't arrive in Foxboro until '96.

It seemed pretty clear to most that Orthwein would move the team following the '93 season. He demanded a new stadium from the state, knowing he would never get one. A proposal was floated at the time to build a megaplex in Boston combining a convention center and indoor stadium. When that failed, it was all but certain that they'd move. The final game that season was against Miami. It was the first sell out in quite a long time. Sign were everywhere begging Orthwein not to move. The Pats beat Miami in overtime to knock them out of the playoffs.

Now we all waited for Orthwein to but out the lease and move. The NFL was powerless to stop him, having lost several times in court when trying to prevent moves. This is where Kraft and his fore sight in buying the stadium comes into play. The Patriots were legally obligated to play their home games in Foxboro Stadium. Kraft was reportedly offered as much as $75 million to tear up the lease. He refused and instead offered to buy the team. After some negotiating, he bought them for the largest price (up to that time) in sports history.

With all this being said, I'd like to add Jankovich-MacPherson to your list. Thanks for dredging up these memories. It's fun to look back at the darkest period in Pats history now that they're one of the premier franchises in the NFL.

[Hawg73]

Originally posted by bideau
With all this being said, I'd like to add Jankovich-MacPherson to your list. Thanks for dredging up these memories. It's fun to look back at the darkest period in Pats history now that they're one of the premier franchises in the NFL.

Bideau,

Thanks for the corrections. It sounds like you know of what you speak so I won't even bother double checking my stats. I knew Belichick wasn't there with Parcells from the start but tried to make the story as brief as possible so left out a few non-salient details.

As far as Weird Sam Jankovich and MacPherson, I remember them fine, but have been trying hard to forget. I can't remember who the temporary head coach was at all, though I've been wracking my brain. Who was it?

[bideau]

Originally posted by Hawg73
I can't remember who the temporary head coach was at all, though I've been wracking my brain. Who was it?

I'll leave it out there in case anyone is as anal as I am when it comes to the Pats (my wife recently complained that I can remember virutally every game I've ever seen but I can't remember not to shrink her favorite sweaters when I do laundry). If no one has the answer by this evening, I'll post it.

[Hawg73]

Originally posted by bideau
I'll leave it out there in case anyone is as anal as I am when it comes to the Pats (my wife recently complained that I can remember virutally every game I've ever seen but I can't remember not to shrink her favorite sweaters when I do laundry). If no one has the answer by this evening, I'll post it.

Dante Scarnecchia. I knew it was a long-timer.

[bideau]

Originally posted by Hawg73
Dante Scarnecchia. I knew it was a long-timer.

Correct. I believe he's been around since at least Ray Berry. I don't know if he was with Ron Meyer. Talk about a survivor!!

[SamBam39]

I've always thought he had naked pictures of Moira Kraft!!!

Scarnecchia that is not Hawg! ;)

Originally posted by Hawg73
I nominate Zeke Mowatt as the New England Patriot's All-Time MVP. Most Valuable Penis.
Originally posted by pookie
I second that!! Great story Hawg.

The man is destined for the hall someday....


Thanks for posting it Hawg. It is a classic.